Chapter 14 of Shmuel Bet is a chapter of diplomacy, of wisdom, and of parables. Yoav ben Tzeruya understands the king's heart concerning Avshalom, and he sends to David a wise woman from Tekoa, placing in her mouth a parable about a widow whose two sons quarreled: one killed his brother, and the entire family rose up against her to demand the blood of the remaining son. The parable was meant to draw a ruling from David's mouth, and then to turn that very ruling against him: if it is not fitting to kill a brother who killed his brother, why do you pursue Avshalom? From here on we will proceed according to the order of the pesukim, following the explanation of the Malbim.
The Oath: Exemption Is Not Enough, a Royal Decree Is Needed
וַתֹּאמֶר יִזְכׇּר־נָא הַמֶּלֶךְ אֶת־יְהֹוָה אֱלֹהֶיךָ מֵהַרְבַּת גֹּאֵל הַדָּם לְשַׁחֵת וְלֹא יַשְׁמִידוּ אֶת־בְּנִי וַיֹּאמֶר חַי־יְהֹוָה אִם־יִפֹּל מִשַּׂעֲרַת בְּנֵךְ אָרְצָה׃ - And she said: Let the king please remember Hashem your God, that the avenger of blood not increase the destruction, that they not destroy my son. And he said: As Hashem lives, not a hair of your son shall fall to the ground.
Notice the woman's persistence: she does not rest until she has obtained everything she seeks. It is not enough for her that David has exempted her from handing over her son. She wants the king to warn the avenger of blood that wherever he encounters her son he will not harm him or kill him. And how will this be guaranteed? By an oath. "יִזְכׇּר־נָא הַמֶּלֶךְ אֶת־יְהֹוָה אֱלֹהֶיךָ" - invoke the name of Hashem in your words, swear, and thus the avenger of blood cannot violate the king's oath.
And why is it fitting to act so? Because this is not like the mitzvah of the Torah that gave a place to the avenger of blood, who in the heat of his heart may strike the unintentional killer. Here, says the woman, the avenger of blood does not remove the destruction but increases it: instead of a single destruction of the death of one brother, they will now kill the second brother as well. Therefore my request is that you decree, by a royal decree and a royal oath, that they not destroy my son. And indeed David swore a complete oath: "חַי־יְהֹוָה אִם־יִפֹּל מִשַּׂעֲרַת בְּנֵךְ אָרְצָה".
Requesting Permission for a New Subject
וַתֹּאמֶר הָאִשָּׁה תְּדַבֶּר־נָא שִׁפְחָתְךָ אֶל־אֲדֹנִי הַמֶּלֶךְ דָּבָר וַיֹּאמֶר דַּבֵּרִי׃ - And the woman said: Let your maidservant please speak a word to my lord the king. And he said: Speak.
Here the etiquette of royalty is revealed. The woman had indeed received permission to speak before the king, but the subject for which she had received permission had concluded. There is no permission to raise before the king another subject for which permission was not granted at the outset. Have you finished your matter? Say thank you very much and go in peace. One cannot stand and chatter all day before the king. Therefore, when she wishes to raise an additional matter, she requests permission anew: "תְּדַבֶּר־נָא שִׁפְחָתְךָ... דָּבָר" - another matter, a new word. And the king answers: "דַּבֵּרִי".
The Parable Becomes the Lesson
וַתֹּאמֶר הָאִשָּׁה וְלָמָּה חָשַׁבְתָּה כָּזֹאת עַל־עַם אֱלֹהִים וּמִדַּבֵּר הַמֶּלֶךְ הַדָּבָר הַזֶּה כְּאָשֵׁם לְבִלְתִּי הָשִׁיב הַמֶּלֶךְ אֶת־נִדְּחוֹ׃ - And the woman said: Why have you thought such a thing against the people of God? For in speaking this word the king is as one who is guilty, in that the king does not bring back his banished one.
Now she approaches the matter itself. "וְלָמָּה חָשַׁבְתָּה כָּזֹאת עַל־עַם אֱלֹהִים" - how did it enter your mind that the story I told you was a true story, and that Israel would commit such a terrible wrong, against reason, against morality, and against nature, to go and kill a brother over his brother? How did you imagine that such a thing is spoken to the king, that such a thing could even be said before a king?
Rather, know this: the thing I told speaks about you yourself, it concerns you directly. For you, my lord the king, are as one guilty according to the halachic ruling that you yourself have just established, "לְבִלְתִּי הָשִׁיב הַמֶּלֶךְ אֶת־נִדְּחוֹ" - in that you do not bring back your son Avshalom. This is precisely the case: one brother killed his brother, and you pursue the murdering brother to kill him. According to your own ruling you are guilty, and therefore it is fitting that you bring Avshalom back, and by this the guilt will be removed from you, so that it not turn out that you issue a ruling that contradicts your own actions.
"Like water spilled on the ground" - three arguments in Avshalom's favor
כִּי־מוֹת נָמוּת וְכַמַּיִם הַנִּגָּרִים אַרְצָה אֲשֶׁר לֹא יֵאָסֵפוּ וְלֹא־יִשָּׂא אֱלֹהִים נֶפֶשׁ וְחָשַׁב מַחֲשָׁבוֹת לְבִלְתִּי יִדַּח מִמֶּנּוּ נִדָּח׃ - For we will surely die, and we are like water spilled on the ground, which cannot be gathered up again; yet God does not take away a soul, but devises means so that the banished one is not cast out from Him.
Here she adds arguments in favor of Avshalom. First argument: "כִּי־מוֹת נָמוּת" - in the end we all die, and the one who was killed was going to die anyway. It turns out that the killer merely shortened his time, and to some degree his sin is lighter. Second argument: "וְכַמַּיִם הַנִּגָּרִים אַרְצָה אֲשֶׁר לֹא יֵאָסֵפוּ" - water that has spilled onto the ground and been absorbed into it does not return. And if so, what do we gain by killing our brother, if by doing so we cannot restore the life of the dead? Amnon, who died, is already dead, and what use is it if you also kill Avshalom? Will you thereby restore the life of Amnon?
"וְלֹא־יִשָּׂא אֱלֹהִים נֶפֶשׁ" - where there is no judgment, judgment must be carried out, but know that the Holy One, blessed be He, shows no favoritism to any soul, and repays each person according to his deeds. Here let us pause for a moment on a point worth reflecting on. People who are far from the mitzvot, when a tragedy strikes them, demand vengeance. They come to court and demand that justice be exacted from the murderer or the one who caused harm, and they fight for this with all their strength. Among those who observe the mitzvot we do not see this to the same degree. Why? Someone who is far from faith in God, if the court lets the murderer go free, finds that this person "celebrated": he both killed his relative and got off clean. And this is outrageous, and rightly so, a sinner profits and pays no price. But if I believe, I know: you may have been released by a court of flesh and blood, but were you released by the Creator of the world? Free for thirty years here, and afterward a long reckoning above. Therefore I do not seek vengeance in this world, for in the end He will bring the person to justice and exact payment. From here comes the greater acceptance we find among those who observe the mitzvot when facing difficult cases: there is judgment, there is a Judge, and there is a reckoning with the Creator of the world. Do not think that if you did not settle the account, the Creator of the world will forget it.
"וְחָשַׁב מַחֲשָׁבוֹת לְבִלְתִּי יִדַּח מִמֶּנּוּ נִדָּח" - the Holy One, blessed be He, repays a person so that through that repayment and punishment he will ultimately merit that no banished one be cast out from Him. According to this, killing Amnon does not carry the great severity of killing an innocent person; rather, there was a man who had to pay a price, and God arranged that he fall by Avshalom's hand, and through this no banished one is cast out from Him. From these words the holy Arizal derives a tremendous principle: there is no person in the world who will not ultimately reach a rectification. All souls will reach rectification. The holy Arizal says, even Bilam. Even what Bilam said, "תָּמֹת נַפְשִׁי מוֹת יְשָׁרִים וּתְהִי אַחֲרִיתִי כָּמֹהוּ" (Let my soul die the death of the upright, and let my end be like his), was ultimately fulfilled in him, for after many reincarnations he merited to reach rectification. A person can be wicked and corrupt, and undergo very harsh rectifications, but in the end all will reach rectification.
Why she spoke in a parable
וְעַתָּה אֲשֶׁר־בָּאתִי לְדַבֵּר אֶל־הַמֶּלֶךְ אֲדֹנִי אֶת־הַדָּבָר הַזֶּה כִּי יֵרְאֻנִי הָעָם וַתֹּאמֶר שִׁפְחָתְךָ אֲדַבְּרָה־נָּא אֶל־הַמֶּלֶךְ אוּלַי יַעֲשֶׂה הַמֶּלֶךְ אֶת־דְּבַר אֲמָתוֹ׃ - Now that I have come to speak this matter to my lord the king, it was because the people made me afraid, and your maidservant said, Let me now speak to the king; perhaps the king will fulfill the word of his handmaid.
כִּי יִשְׁמַע הַמֶּלֶךְ לְהַצִּיל אֶת־אֲמָתוֹ מִכַּף הָאִישׁ לְהַשְׁמִיד אֹתִי וְאֶת־בְּנִי יַחַד מִנַּחֲלַת אֱלֹהִים׃ - For the king will listen, to deliver his handmaid from the hand of the man who seeks to destroy me and my son together from the inheritance of God.
Here she apologizes for using a parable. For David might well take issue with her: why do you speak to me in parables? Speak plainly and directly! Do I not understand if you address me directly about the matter of your son? To this she answers: true, I would have preferred to come and speak directly, that would be more respectable, but "כִּי יֵרְאֻנִי הָעָם" - the people frightened me. They told me: if you come and tell the king that you wish to speak with him about his son, he will immediately tell you not to get involved, this is not your concern, I am not willing to hear you on this matter, and he will send you away from before him. Therefore I said, let me speak to the king through a different story, one resembling the true story, in a parable, "אוּלַי יַעֲשֶׂה הַמֶּלֶךְ אֶת־דְּבַר אֲמָתוֹ". And how will this come about? "כִּי יִשְׁמַע הַמֶּלֶךְ לְהַצִּיל אֶת־אֲמָתוֹ מִכַּף הָאִישׁ" - since in the parable you will listen to save me and my son from the hand of the blood avenger, so too you will draw the conclusion in the matter it represents, that there is no point in harming Avshalom, and you will save him.
"Like an angel of God" - why it is fitting that the king rule this way for himself as well
וַתֹּאמֶר שִׁפְחָתְךָ יִהְיֶה־נָּא דְּבַר־אֲדֹנִי הַמֶּלֶךְ לִמְנֻחָה כִּי כְּמַלְאַךְ הָאֱלֹהִים כֵּן אֲדֹנִי הַמֶּלֶךְ לִשְׁמֹעַ הַטּוֹב וְהָרָע וַיהֹוָה אֱלֹהֶיךָ יְהִי עִמָּךְ׃ - And your maidservant said, May the word of my lord the king be for comfort, for like an angel of God, so is my lord the king to discern good and evil, and may the Lord your God be with you.
What does she add here? She says: for this purpose I summoned my courage and came before the king with this parable, for my main aim is that the word of my lord the king be for comfort, that you have peace of mind to bring back your son with whom you are angry and against whom you hold a grievance, to return him to the palace, so that the anger and the desire to take vengeance against him no longer remain within you.
"כִּי כְּמַלְאַךְ הָאֱלֹהִים כֵּן אֲדֹנִי הַמֶּלֶךְ לִשְׁמֹעַ הַטּוֹב וְהָרָע" - now that you have heard my case and ruled that the killer is not to be put to death, it is fitting that you rule the same way in your own case. For in my case you ruled as one who has no personal stake in the matter, and once you have judged a case in which you are not involved, surely you can draw the parallel and judge your own case as well. And I trust that you are like an angel of God, directed toward the truth, that your mind is straight and pure, and there is no fear that you will pervert justice. Furthermore: "וַיהֹוָה אֱלֹהֶיךָ יְהִי עִמָּךְ" - you have merited divine assistance, and when there is divine assistance the ruling is surely a true ruling.
"Is the hand of Yoav with you?" - David's wisdom
וַיַּעַן הַמֶּלֶךְ וַיֹּאמֶר אֶל־הָאִשָּׁה אַל־נָא תְכַחֲדִי מִמֶּנִּי דָּבָר אֲשֶׁר אָנֹכִי שֹׁאֵל אֹתָךְ וַתֹּאמֶר הָאִשָּׁה יְדַבֶּר־נָא אֲדֹנִי הַמֶּלֶךְ׃ - The king answered and said to the woman: Do not hide from me the thing that I am about to ask you. And the woman said: Let my lord the king speak.
וַיֹּאמֶר הַמֶּלֶךְ הֲיַד יוֹאָב אִתָּךְ בְּכׇל־זֹאת וַתַּעַן הָאִשָּׁה וַתֹּאמֶר חֵי־נַפְשְׁךָ אֲדֹנִי הַמֶּלֶךְ אִם־אִשׁ לְהֵמִין וּלְהַשְׂמִיל מִכֹּל אֲשֶׁר־דִּבֶּר אֲדֹנִי הַמֶּלֶךְ כִּי־עַבְדְּךָ יוֹאָב הוּא צִוָּנִי וְהוּא שָׂם בְּפִי שִׁפְחָתְךָ אֵת כׇּל־הַדְּבָרִים הָאֵלֶּה׃ - And the king said: Is the hand of Yoav with you in all this? And the woman answered and said: As your soul lives, my lord the king, one cannot turn to the right or to the left from all that my lord the king has spoken, for your servant Yoav, he commanded me, and he put all these words in the mouth of your maidservant.
David requests: I want to ask you a question, and I ask that you answer me only the truth. And the question: Is the hand of Yoav with you in all this? How did he know? The king understood that such a woman would not summon the courage to come before the king and tell a whole story, and for what? In order to bring the king's son back to him. First, how does this concern her? What has she to do with matters of the kingdom? An ordinary person is more interested in their bank overdraft than in the disputes of the palace. And second, even if it did trouble her, to approach the king and speak with him in parables is truly a matter of mortal danger: a person does something improper, and the king can in one moment have their head removed. We saw what happened when Naval of Carmel insulted David's messengers, that David came with an army to kill him, and by law he was permitted to.
Therefore it was clear to David that there was another factor here, someone connected to the kingdom, who stood behind the whole matter. And by the way, how was Yoav connected to the kingdom apart from being commander of the army? "Yoav son of Tzeruyah" - since when is a person called by their mother's name? A person is always called by their father's name. Rather, it was for honor, for his mother was David's sister, so that King David was Yoav's uncle. Yoav was very closely tied to the kingdom also through family. And so David asked himself: who is the wise man in the kingdom to whom the matter also pertains, and who is also capable of weaving such a scheme? And we will see further on that Yoav was very cunning. For this reason it was clear to him that if the matter came from a certain direction, it necessarily came from Yoav.
And she answers with an oath: "חֵי־נַפְשְׁךָ אֲדֹנִי הַמֶּלֶךְ אִם־אִשׁ לְהֵמִין וּלְהַשְׂמִיל" - one cannot deviate from all that my lord the king has spoken. That is, Yoav handed me in advance all the matters down to their finest details: what I would say, what you would answer, what I would reply to that, and what you would say afterward. Everything was handed to me exactly, without any possibility of turning right or left. And just as he told me, so indeed was my entire conversation with you. Why was he so certain of this? Because Yoav was well versed in the king's ways of judgment, he knew his reasoning and his manner of thought.
This is similar to what is told about some of the great sages of Israel, that people would bring a book before them to receive an approbation. The great one would say to the author: tell me one novel insight from the book. And the author would tell him an insight. Then: tell me what questions are in the book. And the author would list the difficulties, and the sage would resolve for him, on his own, the answers that the author had written in his book. From the first question and answer he grasped the author's reasoning and manner of mind, and from there he knew the whole book. He no longer needed to read the book in order to write an approbation, for he already knew what the author would ask and what he would answer, what the difficulty was and what the resolution was. Tell me which topics you discussed, and I will tell you what you discussed. And there was an incident with one of the great sages of Israel, where the sage who came to him was very hurt, for he had labored years over his book, and the great one draws out everything, the difficulties and the resolutions, and, as it were, the book is of little use. And it is told that the rabbi from whom people came to receive an approbation fasted over this in order to rectify the matter.
"וְהוּא שָׂם בְּפִי שִׁפְחָתְךָ אֵת כׇּל־הַדְּבָרִים הָאֵלֶּה" - not merely a general outline of what to say to the king, but all the matters, one by one, he placed in the mouth of your maidservant.
לְבַעֲבוּר סַבֵּב אֶת־פְּנֵי הַדָּבָר עָשָׂה עַבְדְּךָ יוֹאָב אֶת־הַדָּבָר הַזֶּה וַאדֹנִי חָכָם כְּחׇכְמַת מַלְאַךְ הָאֱלֹהִים לָדַעַת אֶת־כׇּל־אֲשֶׁר בָּאָרֶץ׃ - In order to bring about a turn in the matter your servant Yoav did this thing, and my lord is wise, like the wisdom of an angel of God, to know all that is in the land.
"לְבַעֲבוּר סַבֵּב אֶת־פְּנֵי הַדָּבָר" - that this matter should bring about another matter, that you would return your son. And the woman adds: in that you knew the matter by yourself, your wisdom was revealed. For you did not see me speaking with Yoav, you did not hear him instructing and guiding me what to say, and yet you knew that the matters stemmed from Yoav. This shows your great wisdom, like the wisdom of an angel of God to know all that is in the land.
David's humility
וַיֹּאמֶר הַמֶּלֶךְ אֶל־יוֹאָב הִנֵּה־נָא עָשִׂיתִי אֶת־הַדָּבָר הַזֶּה וְלֵךְ הָשֵׁב אֶת־הַנַּעַר אֶת־אַבְשָׁלוֹם׃ - And the king said to Yoav, "Behold now, I have done this thing: go therefore, bring back the young man Avshalom."
וַיִּפֹּל יוֹאָב אֶל־פָּנָיו אַרְצָה וַיִּשְׁתַּחוּ וַיְבָרֶךְ אֶת־הַמֶּלֶךְ וַיֹּאמֶר יוֹאָב הַיּוֹם יָדַע עַבְדְּךָ כִּי־מָצָאתִי חֵן בְּעֵינֶיךָ אֲדֹנִי הַמֶּלֶךְ אֲשֶׁר עָשָׂה הַמֶּלֶךְ אֶת־דְּבַר עַבְדֶּךָ׃ - And Yoav fell to the ground on his face and bowed himself, and blessed the king; and Yoav said, "Today your servant knows that I have found favor in your eyes, my lord the king, in that the king has fulfilled the request of his servant."
"הִנֵּה־נָא עָשִׂיתִי אֶת־הַדָּבָר הַזֶּה" - I have listened to the woman's words and accepted them, therefore go and bring back the young man Avshalom. Yoav falls on his face, bows down, blesses the king, and says: today I know that I have found favor in your eyes, that you are willing to do as I asked and bring your son back.
Here David's humility is revealed. Another person would have been offended and said: what is this, you do such things to me by roundabout ways, sending me messengers with parables? I will not agree to it. But King David was humble, and since he judged for himself that it was not fitting to kill the second brother after one brother had killed his own brother, he accepted the matter.
"Let him turn to his own house, and let him not see my face"
וַיָּקׇם יוֹאָב וַיֵּלֶךְ גְּשׁוּרָה וַיָּבֵא אֶת־אַבְשָׁלוֹם יְרוּשָׁלָיִם׃ - So Yoav arose and went to Geshur, and brought Avshalom to Yerushalayim.
וַיֹּאמֶר הַמֶּלֶךְ יִסֹּב אֶל־בֵּיתוֹ וּפָנַי לֹא יִרְאֶה וַיִּסֹּב אַבְשָׁלוֹם אֶל־בֵּיתוֹ וּפְנֵי הַמֶּלֶךְ לֹא רָאָה׃ - And the king said, "Let him turn to his own house, and let him not see my face." So Avshalom turned to his own house, and did not see the king's face.
David commands two things. The first: "יִסֹּב אֶל־בֵּיתוֹ" - that he should not come as a distinguished personage before whom a red carpet is rolled out, with trumpets on both sides and volleys of honor. Rather let him turn to his house, not even going by the main road but circling around, as if he were slipping home unnoticed. I do not want a royal reception to be held for him. The second: "וּפָנַי לֹא יִרְאֶה" - I do not want him to come and see my face, to be a guest of the king and embrace him. From here we see that although David agreed to bring him back, he still held a great grievance against him for what he had done in murdering his brother.
Prelude to the rebellion: the factors that led Avshalom to rebel
וּכְאַבְשָׁלוֹם לֹא־הָיָה אִישׁ־יָפֶה בְּכׇל־יִשְׂרָאֵל לְהַלֵּל מְאֹד מִכַּף רַגְלוֹ וְעַד קׇדְקֳדוֹ לֹא־הָיָה בוֹ מוּם׃ - But in all Yisrael there was no man so highly praised for his beauty as Avshalom: from the sole of his foot to the crown of his head there was no blemish in him.
The following verses are a prelude to Avshalom's rebellion. They give us the background, the soil in which the rebellion grew. Avshalom had certain factors that led him to think he was the one fit for the kingship. First, he was the firstborn after Amnon, and once Amnon died, he was the firstborn. Second, he was so beautiful that there was none like him in all of Yisrael, and beauty is no trivial matter: "מֶלֶךְ בְּיׇפְיוֹ תֶּחֱזֶינָה עֵינֶיךָ" - there is value in the king appearing dignified. On the other hand, "חׇכְמַת הַמִּסְכֵּן בְּזוּיָה," when a person looks wretched and dresses like a pauper, it causes people to despise his wisdom. For this reason Avshalom thought the kingship was fitting for him.
But King David did not think so, and his intention was to make Shlomo king. First, even though Avshalom was the firstborn, David hated him for what he had done. Second, the prophet told David, "Behold, a son will be born to you, he will be a man of rest, he will build My house" - "a son will be born to you" in the future tense, and Avshalom had already been born by then, so it follows that Avshalom is not the one destined to reign. Third, he was told to name him Shlomo, for peace (shalom) would be in his days, which shows that Shlomo is the king. And fourth, David had sworn to Bat Sheva. For we saw that Bat Sheva did not want to be intimate with David after the death of the son born from the first union, while Uriah was at war, and she said: if the son died, apparently this is not pleasing before Hashem. Then David swore to her that the matter was pleasing before Hashem, and on the contrary, this son would reign after him. And as we shall see later, she comes with Natan to David and says to him: my lord swore to your handmaid that my son would reign after me - that oath was given at that time.
All these things brought Avshalom to realize: I am not the crown prince, the kingship does not pass to me. And from this he concluded: if you do not take the kingship into your own hands, no one will hand it to you. If I am not for myself, who will be for me? I must take action in order to seize the kingship, and I cannot expect that someone will hand it to me, for there is another here who is destined to reign.
Avshalom's Hair
וּבְגַלְּחוֹ אֶת־רֹאשׁוֹ וְהָיָה מִקֵּץ יָמִים לַיָּמִים אֲשֶׁר יְגַלֵּחַ כִּי־כָבֵד עָלָיו וְגִלְּחוֹ וְשָׁקַל אֶת־שְׂעַר רֹאשׁוֹ מָאתַיִם שְׁקָלִים בְּאֶבֶן הַמֶּלֶךְ׃ - And when he shaved his head, and it was at the end of every year that he shaved it, for it was heavy upon him and he shaved it, he would weigh the hair of his head, two hundred shekels by the king's weight.
His hair was exceedingly beautiful, his locks curled. And where did this hair come from? Chazal say that Avshalom was a lifelong nazir, and regarding a nazir it says "holy shall he be, letting the locks of the hair of his head grow long." Would his hair keep growing without end? Chazal say: a lifelong nazir lightens it with a razor once a year, meaning he is permitted to remove the heavy part of his hair once a year, not to shave it off completely but to lighten it. And this is what is said, "for it was heavy upon him and he shaved it," when his hair became heavy upon him he would shave it.
And how much did his hair weigh? "Two hundred shekels by the king's weight." The Midrash says that all shekels mentioned in the Prophets are litrin, and a litra is a log, and a log is 345 grams. It turns out, then, that his hair weighed close to seventy kilograms. Understand what mighty hair we are talking about, and in the words of the Malbim this is a most astonishing matter.
His Sons Who Died
וַיִּוָּלְדוּ לְאַבְשָׁלוֹם שְׁלוֹשָׁה בָנִים וּבַת אַחַת וּשְׁמָהּ תָּמָר הִיא הָיְתָה אִשָּׁה יְפַת מַרְאֶה׃ - And there were born to Avshalom three sons and one daughter whose name was Tamar; she was a woman beautiful in appearance.
Here another reason is given for Avshalom's aspiration to the kingship. Three sons and one daughter were born to him, and those sons all died. And how do we know this? From the fact that later on we see that Avshalom set up a monument for himself during his lifetime, and who sets up a monument for himself? One who has no sons, who needs a memorial for himself. Therefore he wanted to reign, and he said: my kingship will be the greatest monument for me. This is the second reason he rose to rebel. And a third reason: his sons died, and his father David did not come to comfort him. This caused anger and deepened the enmity between him and his father, and encouraged him to rise up and rebel.
Two Years in Jerusalem and He Did Not See the King's Face
וַיֵּשֶׁב אַבְשָׁלוֹם בִּירוּשָׁלַיִם שְׁנָתַיִם יָמִים וּפְנֵי הַמֶּלֶךְ לֹא רָאָה׃ - And Avshalom dwelt in Jerusalem two full years, and he did not see the king's face.
וַיִּשְׁלַח אַבְשָׁלוֹם אֶל־יוֹאָב לִשְׁלֹחַ אֹתוֹ אֶל־הַמֶּלֶךְ וְלֹא אָבָה לָבוֹא אֵלָיו וַיִּשְׁלַח עוֹד שֵׁנִית וְלֹא אָבָה לָבוֹא׃ - And Avshalom sent for Yoav, to send him to the king, but he was not willing to come to him; and he sent again a second time, but he was not willing to come.
He dwelt two full years, and still the king was not willing to see his face, and he wants to do something in order to see the king's face. Avshalom calls Yoav to come to him. And Yoav knows very well why he is being summoned: Avshalom wants to see the king's face and wants Yoav to be the go-between. And Yoav also knows that there is no one to talk to, the king will not agree. And if so, from his standpoint it is pointless to go to Avshalom and tell him: there is no chance, the king will not agree to meet you. Therefore he is not willing to come at all. But if you are not willing to come by good means, you will come by means that are not good.
Setting the barley field on fire
וַיֹּאמֶר אֶל־עֲבָדָיו רְאוּ חֶלְקַת יוֹאָב אֶל־יָדִי וְלוֹ־שָׁם שְׂעֹרִים לְכוּ וְהַצִּיתוּהָ בָאֵשׁ וַיַּצִּתוּ עַבְדֵי אַבְשָׁלוֹם אֶת־הַחֶלְקָה בָּאֵשׁ׃ - And he said to his servants: See Yoav's field next to mine, and he has barley there; go and set it on fire. So Avshalom's servants set the field on fire.
וַיָּקׇם יוֹאָב וַיָּבֹא אֶל־אַבְשָׁלוֹם הַבָּיְתָה וַיֹּאמֶר אֵלָיו לָמָּה הִצִּיתוּ עֲבָדֶיךָ אֶת־הַחֶלְקָה אֲשֶׁר־לִי בָּאֵשׁ׃ - Then Yoav arose and came to Avshalom's house, and said to him: Why did your servants set my field on fire?
How did he summon him? Next to Avshalom's house there was a barley field belonging to Yoav. He ordered his servants to burn it, and immediately Yoav arose and came to Avshalom's house to ask: Why did you do this, why did you burn my field? In this way he forced him to come.
But there is a terrible moral lesson here. Chazal say that whoever burns his fellow's money dies without children, Heaven protect us. And this was Avshalom's punishment. A man invested his wealth and his energy, and you rise up and burn it? A harsh, terrible and dreadful punishment.
Avshalom's claim
וַיֹּאמֶר אַבְשָׁלוֹם אֶל־יוֹאָב הִנֵּה שָׁלַחְתִּי אֵלֶיךָ לֵאמֹר בֹּא הֵנָּה וְאֶשְׁלְחָה אֹתְךָ אֶל־הַמֶּלֶךְ לֵאמֹר לָמָּה בָּאתִי מִגְּשׁוּר טוֹב לִי עֹד אֲנִי־שָׁם וְעַתָּה אֶרְאֶה פְּנֵי הַמֶּלֶךְ וְאִם־יֶשׁ־בִּי עָוֺן וֶהֱמִתָנִי׃ - And Avshalom said to Yoav: Behold, I sent to you saying, Come here, that I may send you to the king to say, Why did I come from Geshur? It would be better for me still to be there. Now let me see the king's face, and if there is iniquity in me, let him put me to death.
Avshalom says to him: I sent to summon you so that you would go to the king, and you refused to come, and this was my only option to force you to come. And my claim is: what did you gain for me, Yoav, by bringing me back from Geshur? "Why did I come from Geshur? It would be better for me still to be there." And now see to it that I see the face of my lord the king, and present before him my claims and what I have to say in my defense. And if, despite all my claims, he thinks there is iniquity in me, let him kill me. I am prepared to give up my life to death, but at least let him hear me and see what I have to say.
And the king kissed Avshalom - a kiss of distance
וַיָּבֹא יוֹאָב אֶל־הַמֶּלֶךְ וַיַּגֶּד־לוֹ וַיִּקְרָא אֶל־אַבְשָׁלוֹם וַיָּבֹא אֶל־הַמֶּלֶךְ וַיִּשְׁתַּחוּ לוֹ עַל־אַפָּיו אַרְצָה לִפְנֵי הַמֶּלֶךְ וַיִּשַּׁק הַמֶּלֶךְ לְאַבְשָׁלוֹם׃ - And Yoav came to the king and told him, and he called for Avshalom, and he came to the king and bowed down before him with his face to the ground before the king, and the king kissed Avshalom.
Yoav comes to the king and tells him Avshalom's words, and David is appeased. He calls for Avshalom, and Avshalom comes and bows with his face to the ground as is fitting, "and the king kissed Avshalom." And what is the meaning of "kissed to Avshalom," and what is the difference between "to Avshalom" and "Avshalom (et)"? The Ibn Ezra explains, and the Malbim brings it here: a kiss with the letter lamed is a kiss on the hand or on the shoulder, "I kiss to you." But "and he kissed et" is a kiss on the mouth, and it is a higher degree of closeness. "Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth," says King Shlomo, and the Zohar says that the kisses of his mouth are the joining of spirit to spirit, the highest degree of closeness.
If so, King David here kissed him on his hand or on his shoulder, and not a kiss mouth to mouth. And this shows distance. And here the feeling grows stronger in Avshalom: I am not going to receive the kingship here. David keeps his distance from me, and kisses me only on the hand or shoulder, and not in the way one ought to kiss a firstborn son and heir. Apparently I am not his heir. And this encouraged Avshalom even more to rise up and rebel, as we will see in the next chapter.
Summary:
The chapter opens with the clever ruse of Yoav and the woman from Tekoa, who succeeds in extracting from David a ruling under oath and then turns it against him: if a brother who killed his brother is not to be put to death, then Avshalom too should not be destroyed. David, in his humility, accepts the argument and brings his son back, but with a double reservation: he shall return to his own house and shall not see the king's face. Two years of estrangement, the setting of Yoav's field on fire, and finally a kiss of only partial closeness, a kiss on the hand or shoulder and not on the mouth. All of these, together with his beauty, his being the firstborn, the death of his sons, and his knowledge that the kingship was destined for Shlomo, formed the garden bed in which Avshalom's rebellion in the next chapter took root. And within all this, two points to ponder: "לֹא־יִשָּׂא אֱלֹהִים נֶפֶשׁ" - there is judgment and there is a Judge, and there is no need to seek vengeance in this world; and on the other hand "לְבִלְתִּי יִדַּח מִמֶּנּוּ נִדָּח" - that there is no person in the world who will not ultimately reach his rectification.