We begin the fourth chapter of Pirkei Avos, which opens with the words of Ben Zoma. It is worth noticing that Ben Zoma has no title "Rabbi" before his name - his name was Shimon ben Zoma - because he passed away young and never received semichah. Even so, Chazal emphasize his standing as one of the truly great men of his generation, the generation of Rabbi Akiva, and that is no small thing.
The Mishnah in Sotah (chapter 9, mishnah 15) says: "Mishemes ben Zoma batlu hadarshanim" - when Ben Zoma died, the great darshanim, those who expound the Torah, ceased, and he was the greatest of them. His expositions are already famous in the first chapter of Berachos, and also in the Haggadah of Pesach, where Ben Zoma is the one who comes to support the position of Rabbi Elazar ben Azaryah regarding mentioning the Exodus at night, and it is his derashah that saves the day, if you like. Even in the Gemara in Berachos, in the discussion of interpreting dreams, it says: "One who sees Ben Zoma in a dream should anticipate wisdom," for he was known as an exceptional and brilliant scholar.
The words of the Mishnah, one of the most famous passages in Avos:
"Ben Zoma omer: Eizehu chacham? Halomed mikol adam" - Ben Zoma says: Who is wise? One who learns from every person, as it says, "Mikol melamdai hiskalti" - "From all my teachers I have gained understanding." "Eizehu gibor? Hakoveish es yitzro" - Who is mighty? One who conquers his inclination, as it says, "Tov erech apayim migibor umosheil beruchoy miloched ir" - "One slow to anger is better than a strong man, and one who rules his spirit than one who conquers a city." "Eizehu ashir? Hasameiach bechelko" - Who is rich? One who is happy with his portion, as it says, "Yegia kapecha ki socheil ashrecha vetov lach" - "When you eat the labor of your hands, you are praiseworthy and it is good for you" - praiseworthy in this world, and good for you in the World to Come. "Eizehu mechubad? Hamechabed es habriyos" - Who is honored? One who honors others, as it says, "Ki mechabdai achabeid uvozai yeikalu" - "For those who honor Me I will honor, and those who despise Me will be degraded."
The plain meaning of the words: the wise man is the one who learns from every person, for "from all my teachers I have gained understanding" - from every one of my teachers I acquired wisdom and became wiser. The mighty man is the one who conquers the evil inclination, for one who is slow to anger is greater than a mighty warrior, and one who rules his spirit is greater than one who captures a city. The rich man is the one who is happy with his portion, who eats from the labor of his own hands and is self-sufficient - he is praiseworthy in this world and it is good for him in the World to Come. And the honored man is the one who honors others, as the Holy One says in the book of Shmuel: those who honor Me I will honor, and those who despise Me and treat Me lightly will be degraded.
Three approaches to explaining the Mishnah:
The approach of the Abarbanel (and he is not alone in it): these four things are the four things a person wants to achieve in this world. It may well stem from a place of insecurity, but every person wants at least to convince himself that he is worthy and good, and these are the four dimensions people chase after: to be wise, mighty, rich or honored, or all of them together.
According to this approach, the point of the Mishnah is that chasing after wisdom, power or wealth in a subjective, external way - being wiser than the next person, richer than he is - is a fool's errand, because it is simply a joke. A person thinks he is wise, but he is not as wise as an artificial intelligence chatbot; he thinks he is strong, and a single tiny amoeba can bring him down; he thinks he is rich, and next to a truly wealthy person, or next to a country, he has nothing, and even the richest of the rich is nothing next to a sovereign wealth fund; and if it seems to him that people honor him, they honor him only because they want to get something out of him. If that is the picture, there is nothing here but self-deception with no substance to it. The Mishnah therefore comes to redefine what a person should be chasing after when he wants to be considered wise, mighty, rich or honored.
This does not mean that these are not worthy things to pursue. The Ruach Chaim, Rabbi Chaim of Volozhin, points to the Gemara in Nedarim, where Rabbi Yochanan says that the Shechinah rests only upon one who is mighty, wealthy, wise and humble - three of the four items in our mishnah, with humility standing in place of "honored." It emerges that even the Holy One, as it were, is drawn to these things, that they are worth pursuing, and that a person needs them if he wants to have a proper connection to the Holy One.
This raises the question: how is that fair, and how can a person possibly live up to it? After all, not everyone can be wealthy and not everyone can be wise; some people are born in certain ways and into certain circumstances that cannot be escaped.
The approach of the Ruach Chaim: the solution lies in the fourth item - humility. A person cannot be humble unless he has something to be humble about; without that, he is simply being realistic. To be humble means that a person understands that he possesses these capacities, this power, wealth and wisdom, yet he relates to them with humility, knowing who he really is and what the true context is, and not inflating himself out of all proportion - which is the opposite of humility. According to this approach, all the Mishnah is teaching is this: yes, it is important to be mighty, wealthy and wise, but the way to do it is as a person of humility.
The approach of the Bartenura: the verse in Yirmiyahu speaks of three of these four things: "Al yishalel chacham bechochmaso" - the wise man should not praise himself for his wisdom, the mighty man should not glory in his strength, and the wealthy man should not glory in his wealth. There is only one thing worth rejoicing in and taking pride in: what comes to a person through his relationship with the Holy One, through his understanding and knowledge of the Holy One. Accordingly, the words of the Mishnah echo the verse in Yirmiyahu: the only wisdom being spoken of is the wisdom that brings a person closer to Hashem, the only strength is the strength that brings a person closer to Hashem, and the only wealth is the wealth that brings a person closer to Hashem - and that is what is worth taking pride in. The fourth item, honor, remains a separate discussion, since it does not appear in the verse in Yirmiyahu.
"Eizehu chacham? Halomed mikol adam" - Who is wise? One who learns from every person:
According to the Bartenura: This is the kind of wisdom that one may, as it were, praise himself for - wisdom that brings a person closer to Hashem, and not wisdom for its own sake. A person whose wisdom draws him closer to Hashem is one who relates to every human being as someone who has something to teach him; therefore Hashem can convey His messages to him, and he understands the entire world as something designed to teach him how to relate to Hashem.
According to the Abarbanel: One should not measure himself against the person next to him. What a person knows is no more than a drop in the ocean compared to the Holy One, blessed be He, and compared to all there is to learn. But if what defines him is that he is a learner and a lover of wisdom, then he is wise in his very essence. Any person can be wise at this very moment, if his face is turned toward wisdom, and it does not depend on the quantity of his knowledge.
According to the Ruach Chaim: This is how a humble person relates to wisdom - he does not think he is so clever, and he has enough humility to realize that he still has a great deal to learn, and that every person around him has something to teach him.
It is well known that the Torah is compared to water: a thirsty person does not care where the water comes from, but seeks water wherever he can find it. So too, one whose soul thirsts for the wisdom of Torah will be glad to receive it from any source he can.
As for the proof text - and it is worth noting that the proof texts in all four cases here are especially interesting, since they do not really prove the words of the Mishnah but rather add to it - the verse states: "Mikol melamdai hiskalti" - from all my teachers I grew wise, a verse of King David in Tehillim. On the surface, the point is that one must relate to every person as a teacher. But that very verse concludes, "ki eidvosecha sichah li" - Your Torah and Your testimonies are the subject of my conversation; and in that same chapter (119), a little earlier, it says, "How I love Your Torah, all day it is my conversation." It emerges that the person being described aims to be someone interested in one thing alone - the Torah of Hashem - and wherever he finds it and from whomever it comes, he is ready to learn. This is the kind of wisdom one may take pride in, according to the Bartenura; this is the attitude of the humble person who does not rest on his laurels and is not satisfied with what he already knows, according to the Ruach Chaim; and this is the essential wisdom that does not depend on the scope of one's knowledge, according to the Abarbanel.
"Eizehu gibor? Hakovesh es yitzro" - Who is strong? One who conquers his inclination:
"Conquers" does not mean eliminates. The intent is not to do away with the yetzer hara; the Gemara speaks of the yetzer hara as a necessary evil - without it people would not build their businesses, would not marry and would not have children. The inclination pushes us to do necessary things. But a person must be a conqueror: to subdue it, to be in control, to rule over the yetzer hara rather than letting it rule over him.
According to the Bartenura: The strength under discussion is the strength that brings a person closer to Hashem, namely self-control. Control over other people contributes nothing at all to one's relationship with Hashem, whereas self-control is what enables a person to keep mitzvos and avoid transgressions, and therefore it is worth speaking about.
According to the Ruach Chaim: This is how the humble person approaches strength - not by controlling others, but by controlling himself.
According to the Abarbanel: Who is truly strong? Even the strongest of men cannot stand up to a horse, and all the more so to a machine gun. But one who rules over himself is objectively strong, and this is the strength one should seek and attain.
The proof text: "Tov erech apayim migibor, u'moshel b'rucho miloched ir" - better is one slow to anger than a strong man, and one who rules his spirit than one who conquers a city. Here too the verse adds more than it proves, and it contains two levels:
"Erech apayim" - patience. Someone who could take revenge against one who wronged him, yet does not act out of impulse, but rather learns to control his impulses and to postpone his reaction to a later time. This is better than a "gibor," better than a warrior with big guns and big muscles.
"Moshel b'rucho" - a higher level: one who rules his spirit completely and is not swept along by his emotions at all. He is better than one who rules an entire city, since he rules himself and in fact never takes revenge, because he knows what is right and what is not.
One can think here of the Rambam's words in Hilchos De'os regarding the middle path: a person stands exactly in the middle, with no leaning toward any particular disposition or trait, no special characteristic, but rather he is rational and does what is right and good - what he decides is good and brings him closer to Hashem and to walking in His Torah. These are intellectual decisions and not emotions at all.
This idea appears in halachah as well. The first ruling in the Shulchan Aruch says "yisgaber ka'ari" - strengthen yourself like a lion: when a person confronts the yetzer hara in the morning, he must master it and get up, be fearless as a lion and afraid of nothing; and even if the inclination is stronger than he is, he does it anyway. And the Rambam in Hilchos De'os (end of chapter four) writes about one who "does not eat any harmful food," meaning he does not eat fatty, processed and sugary foods because he knows they are not good for him: "harei zeh gibor" - this one is a strong man. That is the meaning of strength according to the Rambam, echoing our Mishnah: a person in full self-control. How torn we are between the foods that taste good and the foods that are good for us - this is a day after day challenge, and one who meets it and conquers his inclination is the truly strong one.
"Eizehu ashir? Hasame'ach b'chelko" - Who is rich? One who is happy with his portion:
According to the Bartenura, what is the kind of wealth that brings a person close to Hashem? It is the wealth about which a person says: I can stop chasing after money and focus on Torah and mitzvos, because I do not need to earn any more. We have vaccines, and every person, even the poorest of the poor, has toilet paper, a flushing toilet, an oven and air conditioning - things that a king five hundred years ago would have done anything to obtain and still could not have. Back then he would have been considered wealthy, while we do not consider ourselves wealthy at all. The point is that a person gets used to whatever he has; it is a kind of hedonistic treadmill.
Rabbi Noach Weinberg used to ask a question that is very much worth remembering: how much would a person have to be paid for his eyes? The obvious answer: I would not sell my eyes even for fifty million dollars - and even though a person knows he will never earn such a sum in his entire life, it is still not worth giving up his eyes for it. If so, said Rabbi Noach, someone who is capable of being bored by the fact that he has eyes, taking them for granted and not appreciating what he has, is capable of being bored by anything. If his eyes do not excite him in the morning, will a Maserati in the driveway make him excited to get out of bed? A mistake. One who is happy with his portion appreciates what he has and therefore enjoys it; and one who is not happy with his portion - everything he owns is worth nothing to him.
The proof verse: "Yegia kapecha ki sochel, ashrecha v'tov lach" - "When you eat the labor of your hands, you are fortunate and it is good for you" - "you are fortunate in this world, and it is good for you in the World to Come." There is no better fortune and no better state a person can be in in this world than being self-sufficient and independent: "yegia kapecha" - by the work of his own hands, "ki sochel" - that is what supports him. That is an achievement worth talking about, and what more could he ask for? "V'tov lach l'Olam Haba" - such a person will merit good in the World to Come as well. It is good for him because he is not dependent on others and is not pushed into sin; his integrity cannot be compromised, because he does not feel that he has to bend his morals and principles out of need for things - the way so many people do feel. Someone who is not happy with his portion is willing to cut corners and do what is not right in order to get what he imagines he needs, and that is nothing but a mistake.
This is brought in halachah as well. The Tur in Yoreh Deah (siman 246) says: "How great is one who supports himself by the work of his own hands" - it is a lofty level to be able to be independent and support oneself, "and in this lies all honor": in this way a person merits all the honor and all the good that can be attained in this world. What more could he ask for? He supports himself, and everything else is a joke. This is the wealthy man: happy with his portion, content and independent - and all the rest is chasing after a mistake.
"Eizehu mechubad? Hamechabed es habrios" - Who is honored? One who honors others:
According to the Bartenura this is a category that stands on its own, since Yirmiyahu never mentioned honoring others. And why does a person chase after his wisdom, his strength and his wealth? Because he wants honor, he wants people to look up to him and admire him. But that is a mistake: one who chases after honor gets nowhere, and honor runs away from him. The honored one, the one who deserves honor, is the one who honors others - the person who gives respect to his fellow.
What does it mean to be intrinsically deserving of honor? Honor given to a wealthy man, to a wise man or to a powerful man is given because people want something from him or because they are afraid of him, and that is not necessarily real honor. Anyone who examines his own experience will find that the people he genuinely considers worthy of admiration and honor are the ones who are good to others and who treat others with respect. And the test is in a situation where a person is respectful, polite and considerate toward people whom it would be very easy to dismiss and get away with it: how does he treat the coat check attendant, the waiter at his table, the agent at the airport counter during check-in? These people are there to serve, and one can somehow ignore them or dismiss them without anything happening. But "one who honors all people" means one who honors everyone, Jew and non-Jew alike - and that is precisely why he is deserving of honor.
The proof verse: "Ki mechabdai achabed uvozai yekalu" - "For those who honor Me I will honor, and those who scorn Me will be degraded" - the words of the Holy One, and there are two ways to understand them:
As a kal vachomer: if the Holy One is willing to honor those who honor Him, all the more so is this the nature of human beings - that others will honor a person if he honors them. Some reject this approach, since such simple reciprocity does not require a verse; every person knows on his own that if he wants to be honored, he must honor others.
As learning from the ways of the Holy One: one might have thought - why should I give honor to other people? The answer: the Holy One Himself gives honor to those who deserve it, and so should a person. Every human being is created in the image of God, and therefore one should make it a fixed practice to honor and appreciate others.
And ironically: the more a person runs away from honor and gives it to others, the more honor will come to him, and the more he will be, by his very nature, deserving of that honor.
In summary: Ben Zoma redefines the four things people chase after - the wise man is the one who learns from every person, the strong man is the one who conquers his inclination, the wealthy man is the one who is happy with his portion, and the honored man is the one who honors others. We saw three approaches to explaining the Mishnah: the approach of the Abarbanel, that comparative pursuit is a futile task and one must seek these things in their essential form; the approach of the Ruach Chaim, that one should indeed pursue them, but out of humility; and the approach of the Bartenura, that the only wisdom, strength and wealth worth taking pride in are those that bring a person close to Hashem.