Before us is mishnah 13 in chapter 2 of Maseches Avos (and in some versions: mishnah 9). Rabban Yochanan ben Zakkai turns to his five students and says to them: "Tze'u u're'u eizohi derech yesharah sheyidbak bah ha'adam" - go out and determine which is the straight path that a person should cling to.
Our mishnah compared with the first mishnah of the chapter:
This wording stands in contrast to the first mishnah of the chapter, where Rabbi Yehudah HaNasi said: "Eizohi derech yesharah sheyavor lo ha'adam" - which is the straight path that a person should choose for himself. There we dealt with a general question: how should a person approach living a good life? What does it mean to be good? How should he relate to the full range of character traits and to the refinement of his personality as a whole? The answer there, as the Rema understood it and as the Bartenura echoed after him, was the middle path - a path that is good for the person himself, and that even earns him a kind of social feedback: people are pleased with him because he is balanced, neither excessively stingy nor a spendthrift with his money.
Our mishnah deals with a different question. It is indeed wonderful to be complete in all the character traits, and this is a lofty ideal that every person should strive to reach with God's help. But where should he focus his efforts? If he were to focus on one thing - the one thing that would have the greatest impact, that would spill over, as it were, into all his other traits - what should he concentrate on more than anything else? That is the question before us, and the five students answer it with five different approaches. The point is not that the rest are unimportant, but that this is the most important thing, perhaps strategically, the thing that makes a person better in every area.
A preliminary note on our approach to the mishnah:
Some commentators, among them the Maharal in his work Derech Chaim, understand that the five answers were given because there are five types of people. As we saw in the previous mishnah, each of the students had different strengths, and therefore each was given a different prescription regarding what he needed to work on. That may well be so, and there is an important point in it: there is no single solution that fits everyone for every problem, including problems of developing character. We, however, will take a different approach: we will examine the five suggestions as independent proposals, and we will suggest seeing them as a progression, in which each one has an advantage over the one before it.
Rabbi Eliezer ben Hyrcanus - "ayin tovah":
The Bartenura explains that 'ayin tovah' here means being satisfied with what one has, being happy with one's portion. A person looks at his fellow with a generous eye: he does not long for what others have, he is not pained that they possess what he does not, and he does not envy them. Nor does he strive after achievements of his own or chase after luxuries merely because everyone else is chasing after them. The drawback of the opposite trait is clear: the person is focused on others and on acquiring things, and this comes at the expense of his own personal development, at the expense of his Torah study, his mitzvos and his service of God, since he is preoccupied with acquiring possessions and competing with his neighbors.
It is worth noting that Rabbeinu Yonah understands the term 'ayin tovah' in its more familiar sense: the trait of generosity. The person is generous, big-hearted and giving, he wants what is good for others and gives of himself, of his time and of his resources - and this too will spill over and make him a better person in every area.
Rabbi Yehoshua - "chaver tov":
Rabbi Yehoshua says that the path a person should choose first and foremost is "chaver tov" - a good friend. The Bartenura explains, somewhat surprisingly, that this means finding a good friend for oneself. The idea is that the good friend will keep the person on the straight path: he will trust him and rely on him to give honest advice, and when he sees that he has crossed a line, he will bring him back on track.
It is worth recalling the first mishnah of the chapter, where Rabbi said that the straight path a person should choose for himself is "kol shehi tiferes lo" - anything that is good in its own right, and at the same time "tiferes lo min ha'adam" - that he earns the esteem of those around him. That social feedback helps a person know whether he is conducting himself properly. The same idea returns here: the good friend lets a person know what he needs to work on, and the person loves wisdom and values what his friend tells him, and this keeps him on the straight and narrow path.
The Bartenura takes this approach, while Rabbeinu Yonah understands it differently: a "good friend" does not mean acquiring a good friend, but being a good friend. Through being a good friend, a person works on himself and becomes a giver. There are two kinds of people in the world, givers and takers; a person should become a giver, be a good friend to others, and that will spill over into every other area of his life.
It seems that the two understandings do not contradict each other: whether the intention is to acquire a good friend or to be a good friend, it takes one to know one. We have already discussed "k'neh lecha chaver" - acquire for yourself a friend - and we said that one has to pay the price; the acquisition, the price, is a person's own being a good friend. Either way, whether as the main point or as the secondary one, being a good friend and having a good friend are both a virtue.
And why is this virtue greater than the first suggestion, a good eye? Because a good eye - looking kindly upon others, being happy with one's portion, being generous - all of these are wonderful and make a person wonderful, but over time a person can change: he may lose that kindness, become a little jealous, or look with frustration at the fact that he has less than others have. When everything depends on him alone, he may over time drift away from his good character traits. But when he has a good friend, that friend will bring him back on track; this takes a person out of himself, and its benefit is great.
Rabbi Yossi - "Shachen Tov" (a good neighbor):
Rabbi Yossi says: not a good friend, but "shachen tov" - a good neighbor. The Bartenura explains it consistently in his usual way, that a person should find good neighbors for himself. It is very nice to have a good friend, but one sees a friend only from time to time, whereas one sees one's neighbors constantly. Good neighbors influence him and hold him to a higher level: he will not want to do things that are not to their liking, things that are hurtful or that fall below accepted standards - and this will keep him on the straight path.
According to Rabbeinu Yonah, the intention is not necessarily that he should have good neighbors, but that he himself should be a good neighbor. Again, he has to live up to certain standards, to be attentive to the needs and wishes of others and to care about them - and this will spill over into the rest of his personality. Here too the two understandings cut in both directions: being a good neighbor and having a good neighbor, just as was said regarding a friend. Yet the virtue of a neighbor may be greater than that of a friend, since a neighbor constitutes a more constant, consistent and ongoing pressure to live up to a high standard.
Rabbi Shimon ben Nesanel - "Haro'eh Es Hanolad" (one who foresees the outcome):
Usually in Shas "Rabbi Shimon" refers to Rabbi Shimon bar Yochai, but here the reference is to Rabbi Shimon ben Nesanel, who says: "haro'eh es hanolad" - one who foresees the future. Literally, one who "sees what is born" is one who sees what is about to come into being, meaning anticipating the future in advance. The Bartenura explains that this refers to a person who makes the calculation of "mechashev hefsed mitzvah k'neged secharah u'schar aveirah k'neged hefsedah" - weighing the loss involved in a mitzvah against its reward and the reward of a sin against its loss - weighing the rewards and the difficulties of this world against the reward and punishment of the World to Come. Such a person is always aware of the consequences of his actions, both the good and the not so good, and this keeps him on the straight path and influences the rest of his character traits as well.
It emerges that the Bartenura takes this approach in contrast to the usual translation, according to which "seeing what is born" is a purely mental, intellectual matter - like someone who sits on a strategic think tank, or someone in a chess game calculating what will happen five moves later. But since we are dealing with the development of character traits, and with something that is meant to spill over and make a person into someone of good character in every dimension of his personality, "seeing what is born" is understood as weighing the long-term consequences of one's actions - and that will keep him on the straight and narrow path.
Rabbi Elazar ben Arach - "Lev Tov" (a good heart):
The fifth approach is that of Rabbi Elazar ben Arach, who says: "lev tov" - a good heart. The meaning of a good heart is good intentions. The commentators explain that this applies both toward one's fellow and toward the Holy One, Blessed is He. Toward one's fellow - that a person wants to act properly with people, his intentions are good, he wants what is good for them and becomes a giver. And toward the Holy One, Blessed is He - that his heart is directed toward Him, that he wants to do the right thing for the right reasons and to serve Him with a true heart, a whole heart and a loving heart.
The idea, once again, is that these things will spill over into a person's entire character. One whose intentions are good toward the Holy One, Blessed is He, and toward his fellow, will find that it spills over into everything: he will have a good eye, he will be a good friend and a good neighbor, and out of his good intentions toward the Holy One, Blessed is He, he will also come to foresee the outcome of his actions. All of the other qualities are included in this one.
Rabban Yochanan ben Zakkai's decision:
Therefore Rabban Yochanan ben Zakkai said to his five students: "Ro'eh ani es divrei Elazar ben Arach midivreichem, shebichlal devarav divreichem" - I lean toward the approach of Elazar ben Arach, toward a 'good heart', more than the other ideas you raised, because the general principle of his words, the idea of good intentions toward the Holy One, blessed is He, and toward one's fellow, includes within it the other four qualities as well.
In summary: in this Mishnah we are not dealing with the general question of the middle path, but with the question of where a person should focus the main part of his efforts, in a way that will spill over into all of his character traits. We examined the five approaches: a 'good eye' (being satisfied with one's portion according to the Bartenura, and generosity according to Rabbeinu Yonah), a 'good friend' and a 'good neighbor' (both in the sense of acquiring them and in the sense of a person being such a friend and neighbor himself), 'one who sees what will be born' (weighing the long-term consequences of one's actions), and a 'good heart' - which Rabban Yochanan ben Zakkai chose, because his words include the words of all the others.