Room two hundred ninety-nine in the palace of Hayom Yom.
Wednesday, 22 Elul 5703.
Shiurim: Chumash, Nitzavim-Vayelech, Revi'i, with Rashi's commentary.
Tehillim, on the 22nd of the month, one recites chapters 106 and 107, and the three additional chapters for the month of Elul — on this day: 64, 65, and 66.
Tanya: On this day we conclude Iggeret 17. The daily portion begins on page 250 with the words "Vezehu shea'meru Razal," and ends at the conclusion of the letter with the words "menucha ku'."
The source of the present teaching is a letter written by the Rebbe Rayatz on 27 Marcheshvan 5697. In this letter the Rebbe Rayatz speaks about how at times one rebukes another regarding matters one wishes to correct in him, or that one wishes he would conduct himself better and the like; and he emphasizes there at length that if one does this publicly — it only causes harm: one embarrasses the one being rebuked, and not only does one fail to draw him closer, but even if he wishes to draw closer — one distances and repels him.
There he says that there is a maamar with the dibbur-hamaschil "Im yaaleh ruach hamoshel," and one must study this maamar many times over, for in it the way of rebuke is set forth in detail. The Rebbe Rayatz elaborates at great length in the letter on the wickedness of the practice of "stabbing" one's fellow, and he describes it as one who stabs with his fingernails — not a physical stab, but that the moment a person shames his fellow, rebukes him, or says something hurtful to him, he is like one who scratches and stabs him.
He adds there a certain account: at times a person has drunk a bit more than usual, and expresses himself with sharp and repulsive expressions, and the harm in this is very great.
And the conclusion lies in the words that appear in the daily saying: "The teaching of Chassidus demands that reproof come first" — at times one indeed must offer reproof, but what should be the preface for the one giving reproof before the reproof itself? "One must remove the fingernails, not stab." A person must first remove his fingernails, meaning that the reproof should be without stabbing and without injury, "for in the nails they are held fast" ["tufra" in Aramaic — fingernails, "achidan" — grasped]; the kelipot cling to the fingernails. The fingernails are a dangerous thing to which the kelipot cling, and they drag a person into causing another pain and anguish of soul. "Every stab is kelipah and sitra achra."
"And after the cutting of the nails" — after removing the nails, as mentioned, that before the rebuke one must remove the nails so as not to prick. But there is an order in the halachah, as brought in the Shulchan Aruch: a person who trims his nails — what must he do afterward? "He must perform the washing of the hands".
The Rebbe Rayatz also explains this in terms of the service of the soul: if "fingernails" represent the piercing thrust directed at one's fellow, then "cutting the fingernails" means removing the emotional charge within that piercing. Afterward, before a person goes to rebuke his fellow, he must perform an additional act — washing the hands. What is the meaning of washing the hands, and what is its significance in the soul-service of the one who rebukes, prior to the rebuke?
"As its meaning is explained in Da"ch [Divrei Elokim Chaim]" — what is the significance of netilas yadayim (washing the hands)? "The drawing down of the mochin into the middos." The hands symbolize the middos, as is known from the wording of "Pesach Eliyahu": "Chesed is the right arm, Gevurah is the left arm" — the hands are the middos, and the middos are the emotions. If so, the matter of netilas yadayim is to draw down the mochin into the middos.
In simple terms: when you rebuke another person, it should not come from sharp and intense emotions, but rather from mochin — which are calmer and more cooling. And when a person draws down the mochin into the middos, the giving of rebuke will be done without "fingernails," for he has trimmed them, and with careful deliberation, since he has drawn down mochin into the middos — which is the inner meaning of the washing of the hands — and only then will he be able to accomplish the matter of rebuke.
There is also, in the teaching we already studied on 22 Iyar, a matter connected to this same content — what must come before rebuke, so that a person will not stumble and not come to something negative through it.