"When a righteous man turns away from his righteousness and commits injustice, doing according to all the abominations that the wicked man does, shall he live?" None of his righteous deeds that he did will be remembered; because of the treachery he committed and the sin he sinned, in them he shall die. Now the prophet moves to the reverse situation: a righteous person who became wicked. Earlier he spoke about a wicked person who repented. Now he asks: what happens if the situation is reversed? When a righteous man turns from his righteousness and does injustice, doing all the abominations that the wicked man did, shall he live? Do you think he can now perform all the abominations that the wicked man did and still have life decreed for him? None of his righteous deeds that he did will be remembered. All the righteousness he did will be forgotten. On the surface this is astonishing. Why should we say this? A person who was righteous and served Hashem, and now, granted, now he became wicked. So what? Did he do a reset, a delete, did he erase everything he did until now? He did good deeds, so give him reward. Now he does evil deeds, so let him receive punishment. But why suddenly come and say that none of his righteous deeds will be remembered, and because of his treachery and his sin he shall die? What is the logic in this? The Gemara addresses this difficulty and says that here we are speaking about one who regrets his former deeds. Regretting the former deeds means: not simply a person who until now was righteous and now suddenly his evil inclination overcame him and he became a heretic. That is not what we are speaking about. We are speaking about someone who regrets the former deeds. "Oh, what a shame that I did mitzvot, what a shame that I wasted my time, for during that time I could have pursued desires and pleasures." He regrets, what a waste of that time. He regrets, what a shame that I devoted my time to Torah and mitzvot. This is called regretting the former deeds. And since he regrets the former deeds, we say that in this situation his former deeds are erased. So would you suppose, would it even enter your mind, that he could do all the abominations the wicked man did and still live? He tells them: it is impossible. After none of his righteous deeds will be remembered - and why will they not be remembered? Because he regrets them. And if you would say "would that I had never done them," then he now deserves death on two counts. First, because of his treachery, he now betrayed Hashem, he abandons the path of righteousness, he regrets it. Second, because of the sin he sinned, that is from here onward. He does not only regret the past, he also, so to speak, resolves for the future to improve his ways, in quotation marks. From now on he begins to commit transgressions as well. So you deserve punishment both for regretting the good deeds and for the evil deeds you now continue to do. That is "the sin he sinned." For these two things, in them he shall die. The Malbim says that whenever the term "treachery" (me'ilah) is written, it denotes change. There is no me'ilah, says the Sifra, except change. That is, this item was designated for the holy, and I take it and remove it to the mundane. What have I incurred? A guilt offering, if I did this with a consecrated item and the like. So to commit me'ilah is always to take something that was proper and remove it to a state of ruin. The same when we speak of a woman who is unfaithful and commits treachery against her husband. Why? Because she was faithful to him and now betrays him. A man commits treachery against his fellow. So here too, he tells you, this person committed treachery. In what did he commit treachery? That until now he was righteous and cleaved to Hashem, and now he abandons the path of Hashem. So this person committed treachery against the Holy One, blessed be He, for until now the Holy One, blessed be He, was with him, and now he abandoned Hashem, may He be blessed.
"Yet you say, the way of Hashem is not right." Hear now, O house of Israel: is My way not right? Are not your ways the ones that are not right? They say the way of Hashem is not right. First of all, what does "not right" mean? We use this expression often, but we do not fully understand its meaning. The Malbim explains that the hitpael form of "tochen" (measure) refers to something that is balanced in measure and weight, without excess or deficiency. A thing that is properly ordered means exactly as it should be: not too much, not too little, ordered to its proper weight. "And you shall give the measure of bricks" - exactly according to the quantity you must give. "The silver that was measured out (metukan)" - meaning what is prepared precisely by measure. "And he measured out (tichen) the water by measure" - again, in the precise measure. So they say, the ways of Hashem are not right, meaning the ways of Hashem are not in proper measure. This is what "not right" means: not according to proper proportion, which means balanced measure, as it were, according to justice and fairness. "Yet you say, the way of Hashem is not right." Hear now, O house of Israel: is My way not right? Are not your ways the ones that are not right? For your way is not the straight path. This is also like "tichon," the middle path, which is the balanced and straight path. What is the meaning of this? What is their claim? The Malbim explains that they come to philosophize from the standpoint of inquiry. They say, the philosophers and thinkers had this claim, and the Malbim also dealt with this at length in the book of Iyov, where we learned this matter and elaborated on it more. There the philosophers claim: how can the Holy One, blessed be He, undergo a change from unwilling to willing, or from willing to unwilling? For the Holy One, blessed be He, is unified, the Holy One, blessed be He, does not tolerate changes, the Holy One, blessed be He, does not... meaning "tolerate" not in the sense of suffering, but in the sense of something that is not affected and has no change at all. The Holy One, blessed be He, "I, Hashem, have not changed, and you, the children of Israel, have not been consumed." There is no change in the Holy One, blessed be He. And if you say there is change in Him, then, as it were, the Holy One, blessed be He, is flawed, He is deficient. Why? What does change stem from? My opinion was such, and you managed to convince me otherwise. What does that mean? That a change occurred in me. If a change occurred in me, it means that until now my view was not perfect, and now it is perfect. Good that you informed me, now I know. This cannot be said of the Holy One, blessed be He. Change does not apply to the Holy One, blessed be He, because what you know and what you will know, everything is already known to Him. Hashem calls the generations from the beginning, and no change occurs in Him. Therefore, what the philosophers set out to investigate and contemplate: how can it apply to the Holy One, blessed be He, that once He wanted to do him harm, and now He wants to do him good? Once He desired his death, and now He desires his life. How is it possible? If Hashem desired the righteous and hated the wicked, how could His will toward them suddenly change - through what? Through the change in their deeds? For again, there is no change in the Holy One, blessed be He. And if there is no change in the Holy One, blessed be He, what happened here now that suddenly one upon whom death was decreed, life will be decreed for him? And clearly, if life was decreed for him, death will be decreed for him. That is one question. The second question they ask: does a servant who ruined his work - would it enter one's mind that he could repair it by regretting? Imagine that a person murdered someone, and afterward he regretted his deed very much. Will the victim return to life? No. A person destroyed something, burned his fellow's car in his anger. He regretted it with complete regret. Will the car return to its former state? This is what they come to claim. This person was wicked until now. How do you want to claim that through his regret, that he repented, the matter returned to its previous state and was rebuilt, and the ruined work became repaired? How could such a thing enter one's mind? And the same in reverse. You tell me that the righteous person who until now did mitzvot and good deeds, and regretted, regretting his former deeds, erased everything he did. How is it possible? They ask the same question here too. Just because a person worked for you for three years, at the end of three years he should receive wages, and he says to you: listen, I am not continuing here. Know this, I am not working for you anymore. Ah, you are not working for me anymore, so you do not deserve wages. What is the connection? He worked for you three years, give him wages for three years. From here on do not pay him. But regarding what already was, how can you erase it? The same here: a person says, I regret that I served Hashem. What do we tell him? That's it, you will not receive wages. Why not receive? From now on, whatever I do, give me punishment. But for what I regretted, for what I did until now, why do you cancel my reward for that? And the same with an employer: say I regret every day I worked for you. Every day I worked for you was hell, I regret it. Ah, so you do not deserve wages. What is the connection? So I do not deserve double wages, since it was very hard for me now. But to say you do not deserve wages, what is the logic? These were the two claims they raised against the way of Hashem. "Yet you say, the way of Hashem is not right."
A person who is diligent and energetic, who went and sowed the field, prepared it, plowed it, everything wonderful, rain fell, everything began to grow. Now imagine a person: "I passed by the field of a lazy man, and it was entirely overgrown with thorns, its surface covered with nettles." To go plow, to sow, is not for him. Rain falls, nothing grows. Now say here, look, the Holy One, blessed be He, gave to this one and did not give to that one. How can that be? Says the Holy One, blessed be He: I gave to everyone equally. That person came to receive, that one did not come to receive. The one who sowed came to receive the good. Here he received rain, it watered his field. For the second one it only made puddles and mud. He did not prepare his field, and consequently the field was not fit for growth.
Now, what will happen if the situation is reversed? What will now happen if that person upon whom, as we said, poverty was decreed. If you like, define it as poverty was decreed upon him, for grain does not grow for him, he has nothing to eat. Now poverty was decreed upon this person. He regretted, he says: you know what? I really need to start managing things differently. He went, plowed the field, removed the thorns, prepared it, sowed. In the next rain, ah, how wonderful, the field yields its fruit. There is wheat, there is something to eat. Ah, so now Hashem changed His mind. Hashem decided now that this person will have. What a distortion. How can that be? Says Hashem: I brought down the rain earlier too. The person prepared himself to receive the abundance. He prepared himself, so he will have. And suppose now that the one who was previously diligent and went and plowed, now regretted and went and uprooted everything. And now rain falls, what does he have? He is left only with rot in the field, nothing. Ah, now Hashem regretted, Hashem changed His mind, decided not to give to that one. Give what? The person went and uprooted what he had done. The moment he went and uprooted what he had done, consequently the rain now no longer benefits him in any way.
So the Malbim says, so too here. Hashem tells them: the change is not in the One who provides, the change is in those who receive. And when a person ruins and evil comes to him, about this it is written, "your own evil will chastise you." Your evil is what harms you. Not I, says Hashem, I always provide abundance. Prepare vessels and you will receive. Do not prepare vessels and you will not receive. But to come and claim that My deeds are not right, that My way is not right? Says the Holy One, blessed be He: My way is a way that stands on one constant proportion that is not subject to change. Your way is the way that changes. And this is what is written in Yeshayahu: "For My thoughts are not your thoughts," for as the rain and the snow come down from heaven and water the earth and make it bring forth and sprout, and so on. There we elaborated on this matter in Yeshayahu chapter 55, where he details this subject more.
Now he will explain. "And when a righteous man turns from his righteousness and commits injustice and dies for them; because of the injustice he did he shall die." "And when a righteous man turns from his righteousness" means, as we explained, one who regrets the former deeds and regrets the righteousness he did. And not only that, but he also "commits injustice" from here onward. About this he says he will be smitten doubly. First, when we look at his former state, for according to his former state his sin now grows sevenfold. A person who knows nothing, who grew up somewhere and is a captured infant, well, what can be demanded of him? But you were righteous. And since you were righteous, the demand upon you is far greater. It is written that the nazir must bring an offering when he completes his days of naziruth. We spoke about this, we gave an entire talk about it. The Ibn Ezra asks: why must he bring an offering? After all, until now he did something elevated. And now he returned to his former state. So what do you want from him? Why does he need to atone, and for what? Now he is like every person. Do you demand an offering from everyone? So I returned to being like every person. The answer is: after you breathed the air of the summits, how could you suddenly fall? Wait, but everyone, true, not everyone reached the heights. But you reached the heights. And if you reached the heights, you were forbidden to descend. You already attained. One who already attained must remain and hold onto his level. And this is what he says here, that there will be a demand upon this person, after he already attained and already had closeness to Hashem and was in the category of a righteous person, and he abandons the good path that he already held; the demand upon him is far greater.
Furthermore, from here onward, as we said, he does evil deeds. For this he dies for them, on account of these two matters: that he abandoned the good path and now begins to do evil deeds. On account of this, because of the injustice he did he shall die. On account of his former righteousness that he abandoned, and on account of the injustice he does in the future. Says Hashem: in any case, understand, the change is not from My side. That is "because of the injustice he did he shall die." He went and uprooted all the crops that the rain caused to grow. What do you want from Me? I brought down rain for him as needed. He went and uprooted the crops. Says Hashem: the sin is what kills. No, I do not kill. For "out of the mouth of the Most High evil and good do not proceed." What a person does, he does to himself. And so, the moment he did evil, it turns out that "your own evil will chastise you," and your ruinations and your evil deeds are what smite you. "The foolishness of man perverts his way, and his heart rages against Hashem." He comes with complaints against the Master of the World; this is your foolishness. The ruined deeds you did brought the trouble upon you. So will you then cry out, Master of the World, why does this happen to me? Do not eat glass and then complain about a stomachache. You perform a bad and evil act, and then come with grievances against the Holy One, blessed be He.
"And when a wicked man turns from his wickedness that he did, and does justice and righteousness, he shall keep his soul alive." He says: when a wicked man turns from his evil way, from the wickedness he did - and note here too - and does justice and righteousness. Says Hashem: I changed nothing. I continue to bring down rain as usual. It is he who went now and sowed his field. He did justice and righteousness. And therefore, note, he shall keep his soul alive. Says Hashem: it is not I. I did not change his situation. I provide constantly. But now he prepared vessels. So since it is so, he himself keeps his soul alive. Righteousness gives life to those who possess it. And the Malbim also says regarding this that we see there is a distinction in the matter of repentance. For if he repents only from here onward, and does not regret the former deeds, then about this it is said "he shall keep his soul alive." Since he repented out of fear, he does not regret the former deeds, so he keeps his soul alive from here onward.
"And he sees and turns from all his transgressions that he did, he shall surely live, he shall not die." Note, here he adds to what he said earlier. Earlier we spoke only of his doing good from here onward. But if he sees with the eye of his intellect and turns from all his transgressions that he did, and now does repentance also regarding the past, then from all his transgressions that he did, he shall surely live. For when a person repents out of love, then his intentional sins turn into merits. This is also the reason why the Holy One, blessed be He, will look at his former state, and this will now be a reason to increase his merit. Just as with the righteous person, his former state as a righteous person increases his wickedness now - how were you such a righteous person, what happened, how did you become corrupted now? - the same with the wicked person, that he was such a wicked person now increases his merits when he returns to being righteous. When he becomes righteous, since it was very hard for this person to change his ways from wicked to righteous. And we will see this later, "according to the pain is the reward." Therefore for this he deserves far more. He shall surely live, he shall not die. For this too he deserves life, since now his intentional sins turned into merits for him.
"Yet the house of Israel says, the way of Hashem is not right." Are My ways not right, O house of Israel; are not your ways the ones that are not right? "Yet the house of Israel says, the way of Hashem is not right." Here too they still argue, the way of Hashem is not right. How does the Holy One, blessed be He, make merits out of sins? And the wicked, how can he suddenly become righteous now? And how can it be that the sin of the righteous is greater than the sin of the wicked, and the merit of the wicked greater than the merit of the righteous? That is, the wicked who now became righteous will have more merits than the original righteous person. And the righteous who became wicked will have more liabilities than the original wicked person. How can it be that this change he made changes the judgment toward them? To this he says to them: know that in this too there is no change in the way of Hashem. Rather, only your way is the one that changes. For you in fact always change your ways. And this is what he tells them now: therefore, I will judge you each according to his ways, O house of Israel, says Hashem Elokim. Repent and turn back from all your transgressions, and iniquity will not be a stumbling block for you. Through the fact that you change your way to repent or to become wicked after being righteous, says Hashem, I will judge each of you according to his ways, O house of Israel. I will judge you according to both ways. I will now weigh the current way against the former way, and judge accordingly. This is as we explained earlier: a penitent who now does a good deed, his merit is many times greater than the righteous person who does a good deed. And why? Because he was accustomed to sin, and his way was always toward evil, and for him to overcome is the splitting of the Sea of Reeds. For this he certainly deserves far greater reward. A person who until now was accustomed to smoke on Shabbat, and suddenly decides to make a resolution and stop smoking. We will compare him to a person who, say, smokes every day and on Shabbat stops smoking. He will tell you: listen, it is not easy for me either. Yes, but do you have his struggle? Do you know what an inclination he had to break? You have not smoked on Shabbat for 30 years. True, it is not easy, but in any case you do not have such a battle. But the one who until last week still smoked and this Shabbat took upon himself to stop, do you know what effort he needs, what spiritual strength he needs? Says the Holy One, blessed be He: I examine the matter, and according to the pain is the reward. When a person was wicked until now and changes his ways, he truly deserves great reward for this. And the same with the righteous who became wicked, he deserves great punishment for this. For you were righteous, and the good natures and traits were an acquired possession in your soul. What someone else would have needed to overcome and strive greatly for, for you it already came easily, you already held onto the straight path. How did you now go and abandon it?
Therefore he says to them: repent and turn back from all your transgressions. He tells them: strive to repent out of love. So that through this, not only will you be righteous from here onward, but it will also repair everything you did before. All the transgressions you had before, these transgressions will not be a stumbling block of iniquity for you. Since these transgressions will now, from here onward, turn into mitzvot. As long as a person repents out of fear, his transgressions turn into unintentional sins. Hashem turns intentional sins into unintentional ones. But in contrast, if you repent out of love, then even the stumbling block is removed, and it will not be a stumbling block for you. A "stumbling block" refers to an unintentional sin. It will not be a stumbling block of iniquity for you. The iniquity will not even become a stumbling block, that is, not even an unintentional sin, but on the contrary, it will even turn into a mitzvah. For when a person repents out of love, the intentional sins turn into merits.
"Cast away from yourselves all your transgressions that you have transgressed, and make for yourselves a new heart and a new spirit. For why should you die, O house of Israel?" He tells them: but even if you have not yet reached this level of repentance out of love, which means the intentional sins turn into merits, at least cast away from yourselves all your transgressions. Like a person who casts off some heavy burden that he seeks to be rid of. And what will you gain through this? That your transgressions will at least not be at the level of "transgression." For "transgression" (pesha) refers to a person who rebels against Hashem. For when a person repents out of fear, at least the intentional sins turn into unintentional ones. So that is already a gain. They will not judge you as transgressors and rebels, but as unintentional sinners. And regarding this he says to them: and make for yourselves a new heart, that you should have a new choice. The heart - the Malbim in several places, wherever the heart is mentioned, the Malbim notes and explains that the heart is the ruling faculty. And in essence the spirit is the part of the imagination, which raises images upon the heart, and through this seduces the heart to act according to the desire of the spirit. And until now the spirit was raising images of iniquities, of sins. For every iniquity begins in the imagination. These are called the "images," what a person pictures in his imagination. How do they want to entice us with some special food? They show you the pizza with the steam and how the yellow cheese stretches from above and... it is always less tasty than how it is photographed. Always. Not only because they put fewer ingredients than what is photographed. Not only for that reason. Because at first the imaginative faculty operates, and the imaginative faculty always shows us something far more special than it really is. And through the imaginative faculty operating on the heart, it thereby inclines the heart. And therefore he says here: strive that the spirit should raise upon the heart only good images, good imaginings, of Torah, of serving Hashem, of the fear of Hashem. And then through this you will have a new heart and a new spirit. The spirit will raise only good imaginings and images, and then the heart too will rule with the fear of Elokim. And why should you die, O house of Israel? He tells them: repent so that you will not die. Now he is speaking about repentance out of fear of punishment, as we said, at least that.
Hashem tells them: even such repentance I will accept. Even though it is repentance small in its value, minimal, it is repentance out of fear, and repentance out of fear is something seemingly deficient. Says Hashem: why will I accept such repentance? "For I do not desire the death of the one who dies, says Hashem Elokim; so turn back and live." First reason: I do not desire the death of the one who dies. By the way, from here the Sages learn that the wicked in their lifetime are called dead. "The death of the one who dies." He is already considered dead in his wickedness. Says Hashem: I do not desire his death. Furthermore, through this repentance you will afterward also come to repentance out of love. You will rise in level. And then, "turn back and live." You will also return regarding the former iniquities, you will turn them into merit, and you will live eternal life. Therefore Hashem tells them: My way is right, and it is your ways that are not right.
With this we have essentially finished the chapter. And here, in conclusion, I would like to speak about a matter mentioned here, because this matter is discussed at length by the later authorities. It is famous as a question that Rabbi Elchanan Wasserman asked the Chofetz Chaim, which is a very powerful question, and afterward many tried to answer it, with one saying this and another saying that, and now we wish to examine the matter. The question that Rabbi Elchanan Wasserman asked the Chofetz Chaim, his teacher - Rabbi Elchanan Wasserman, may Hashem avenge his blood - he asked him: the Mesilat Yesharim says that repentance is an enormous act of kindness. The Mesilat Yesharim says that from the standpoint of logic, there is no such thing as repentance. It could not enter one's mind that repentance is something effective. The Mesilat Yesharim says that we must understand that indeed, let us read his language: how can a person repair what he distorted, when the sin has already been done? A person who ruined, as we said earlier, burned down someone's house. So now I repented, will the house return? Murder. I repented, so will the dead come back to life? This is what he says: if a person murdered his fellow, if he committed adultery, how can he repair this thing? Can he remove the completed act from reality? How is it possible? What has already happened has happened. It cannot be repaired. Note what the Mesilat Yesharim says about this: there is a very special attribute, the attribute of mercy. However, the attribute of mercy is what provides the opposite of the three things we mentioned. Namely, that He gives the sinner time and does not blot him out from the earth the moment he sins, and that the punishment itself will not be until total destruction - this he mentioned earlier, we will not dwell on it - and that repentance is granted to sinners as a complete kindness, so that the uprooting of the will is considered as the uprooting of the deed. He says: do you know what an enormous kindness there is here? That when the penitent recognizes his sin and admits it and contemplates his evil, and returns and regrets it with complete regret from the outset - would that I had never done this - like the regret that annuls a vow, that he is entirely comforted and wishes and yearns that this thing had never been done, and grieves in his heart with strong grief over the fact that it was already done, and abandons it for the future and flees from it - behold, the uprooting of the thing from his will, I do not want the thing, is considered for him like the uprooting of a vow. Just as a vow is uprooted retroactively from the outset, so too here. And this is what the verse says, "and your iniquity is removed and your sin atoned," that the iniquity is actually removed from reality. And it is uprooted through the fact that now he grieves and is comforted over what was, retroactively. And this is certainly a kindness that is not according to strict law.
He says this is an enormous kindness that cannot be estimated or described. Such a thing would not enter one's mind. A person comes to court, they tell him: sir, you are accused of murder. He says: correct, your honor the judge, but I regret it. I repented. Do they send him home? Would it enter one's mind? Certainly not. So how then does the Holy One, blessed be He, do such a thing here? This is a kindness unparalleled. Rabbi Elchanan Wasserman asks: I do not understand, why is everyone so amazed here by the kindness? He says: where is the kindness here? He says: this is in fact the way of the Holy One, blessed be He. Tell me, what happens when a person was righteous and regretted the former deeds? He regretted the righteous deeds he did. What did you say? He erased everything. Nothing, nothing will be remembered. So why are you amazed by the kindness of repentance? This is the way of the Holy One, blessed be He. Whoever did something and regretted it, He erased it. So just as you understand that a person who was righteous, and regretted and erased the righteous deeds, so too someone who was wicked and regretted, erased the liabilities. Where do you see kindness here? Where do you see kindness here? There is nothing here beyond nature. This is the conduct of the Holy One, blessed be He, both for good and for bad. For even one who was righteous, you see that the Holy One, blessed be He, does this to him. Is that kindness? No. Rather, what do you say? Strict law dictates it. Strict law dictates: you regretted, you erased your mitzvot. So if so, strict law also dictates that if I regretted the transgressions, I erased them. Why are you amazed by the kindness here? There is no kindness here. This is strict law, whether for the righteous or the wicked. So the Chofetz Chaim was asked, so Rabbi Elchanan Wasserman asked the Chofetz Chaim.
The Chofetz Chaim answered and replied. He told him: look, you are right. Indeed, in repentance out of fear there is no kindness. For in repentance out of fear, the law dictates it. Just as a person regretted his mitzvot and they were erased for him, one who regretted his transgressions has them erased. So the law dictates. But he says: come, let us think for a moment. This person who repented - let us speak in reverse, let us speak about the righteous person who regretted the good deeds he did. Does the Holy One, blessed be He, consider the good deeds he did as iniquities? Will He now prosecute him and give him Gehinnom for them? No, it is not written that it goes that far. It is written that when a person regrets, the good deeds are erased. The same should have been the case with the wicked person too. When he regrets, the evil deeds should have been erased. But to now come and take all the evil deeds and consider each evil deed as a mitzvah? Ah, that is kindness. That is kindness. The kindness is that the Holy One, blessed be He, in repentance out of love, turns the intentional sins into merits. Here is the kindness. That is, you are right that indeed in repentance out of fear there is no kindness, and in repentance out of love there is kindness.
Rabbi Elchanan Wasserman did not accept this. And the reason he did not accept it is that he said the words of the Mesilat Yesharim imply otherwise. The Mesilat Yesharim says that a person cannot repair what he distorted and sinned. For a person who murdered his fellow, who committed adultery, how can he repair this thing? He cannot remove the completed act from reality. He did not distinguish between whether you repented out of fear or repented out of love. In reality it is impossible to repair a ruination. It is Hashem's kindness that Hashem gives the possibility to repair the ruination. He is not speaking about the very matter that the Holy One, blessed be He, now turns it into merits for you. Without that, he does not enter into it. He speaks about the very matter: where have we heard that a person did something and now removes it? Impossible, it does not apply. Here, you see that it does. When the person was righteous and did righteous deeds, and Hashem removes it from him. Where is the kindness? To come and say that he spoke only of repentance out of love is very hard to say. And therefore Rabbi Elchanan Wasserman has a different answer. He wants in fact to distinguish and say that every evil deed a person does has two consequences to the act of transgression. One thing: the Holy One, blessed be He, said not to do, and you did. You rebelled against the divine command. Hashem said not to do, and you defied His word. Furthermore, the transgression you committed damages the person. He gives an example. Father told you not to run into the road. The child ran into the road, and Hashem have mercy, was hit by a passing car. What do we say now? He committed two transgressions here. One transgression: father told him not to run into the road. Even if nothing had happened to him, he defied his father's word. Second, he was also hit. That is, damage was created here. So too every transgression. Every transgression a person commits contains, first, the defiance of Hashem's word. Second, the person brings ruination upon his soul. He damaged his soul through the transgression.
And this, by the way, is an explanation for what many ask: how can you tell me that a person who repents, for the mishnah says "you are betrothed to me on condition that I am a completely righteous man," and even if he is completely wicked, it is written that she is betrothed. Ah, but he said "on condition that I am completely righteous," and he is known, he is of the lowest realm. How did he suddenly become... The Sages say: perhaps he contemplated repentance. There is a possibility that in one moment he contemplated repentance. Ah, how wonderful, so in one moment that he contemplated repentance, everything is repaired? So tell me, why all the fasts written in the Reishit Chochmah and in the Arizal, that one who mocks must fast 151 fasts. For one act of mockery, 151 fasts. For a blemish of the covenant, 84 fasts. And so on in this manner. Each and every thing, see how many fasts. For this one also needs rolling in snow, for this needs such, for this needs such. What rectifications. You just said that the person in one second said "on condition," that perhaps he contemplated repentance in his heart, and he is already righteous. If he is already righteous, what are all these rectifications for? The answer is: there are two acts, two aspects to the transgression. There is one aspect: the defiance of Hashem's word. For this, in one moment you repent, completely righteous. Says Hashem: I forgive you for defying My word. But think, a person who ruined, what did he do? He soiled the upper worlds. This now needs to be repaired. He soiled the soul, this needs to be repaired. The mortifications, the fasts, all these matters, this is against the level of the blemish made in the soul. And these are two separate levels. Says Hashem: regarding your defying My word, one does not move from there until they are forgiven. Says Hashem: I forgive you. For certain transgressions. Says Hashem: I forgive you. But there is a ruination. And this ruination now requires repair. About this he comes and says: when a person regrets the former deeds, it does not help to uproot from here onward. It only helps to uproot what he rebelled against. It helps to be saved from punishment. But the very blemish made in the soul, in the very rebellion, this blemish exists. Regretting the former deeds cannot uproot it. It is already a reality in his soul. Says the Rav, and here we see Hashem's kindness. And Hashem's kindness is that the Holy One, blessed be He, uproots even this reality that is in his soul. He gives you the possibility to repair even this. In contrast, when a person did mitzvot, the person did mitzvot and regrets - what a shame that I obeyed Hashem's voice - the rectification in his soul, what he already did, this rectification will remain in existence. The rectification remains in existence. What does not? He will not receive reward for them. For those mitzvot you will not receive reward. But the rectification in his soul exists. The same should have been for a person who committed transgressions. The ruination in his soul exists. Says Hashem: I will not give you punishment for becoming wicked, but what can be done, your soul is blemished. Hashem's kindness in repentance is that the Holy One, blessed be He, also cleanses this. Hashem's kindness in repentance is that the Holy One, blessed be He, wipes away the sin. "And your iniquity is removed and your sin atoned," that the iniquity is actually removed from reality, and is uprooted through the fact that now he grieves and is comforted over what was retroactively, as the Mesilat Yesharim says. And "when Hashem will have washed away the filth of the daughters of Zion," which means a complete cleansing, also the cleansing of the soul. This is the kindness in repentance, even in repentance out of fear. This is the kindness in repentance. And this thing, seemingly, is something we do not find in reverse. When the righteous person regrets the former deeds, Hashem does not soil his soul. The cleanliness in his soul is a cleanliness in his soul, it exists. Only regarding receiving reward for the mitzvot, that you will not receive. So that in practice we see a great difference between one who repents and one who regrets his good deeds, and there is great kindness in one who repents.
Rabbi Gabriel Toledano in the book Mitzadei Gever wonders about this. He says: what he claims, that one who regrets the former deeds loses only the portion of the mitzvah, of what he did not obey - what he in fact obeyed Hashem's word, this he loses, but the very rectification in his soul, this he does not lose - he says, this does not quite fit the language of the Gemara. The Gemara says: Rabbi Shimon ben Yochai says, even one who was completely righteous all his days and rebelled at the end, he lost the former deeds. This implies that he lost completely. It does not imply that no, he still has the purification, only what he did of Hashem's will, this he lost. No, it implies that he lost completely. Moreover, it is written "the righteousness of the righteous will not save him on the day of his transgression." This implies that it does not exist at all. So too it is implied from the Rambam, that it is completely erased. If you say the rectification he made in his soul remains, then it would be fitting that this should save him on the day of his wickedness. Why do you see that it does not save him on the day of his wickedness? This implies that it does not remain at all. It implies that the erasure is complete. And if the erasure is complete for the righteous person, then what is the kindness for the wicked person that his iniquities too are erased for him? The question returns.
There are other answers that have been said on this. I will tell you an answer written in the book Merchavei Yam on tractate Sanhedrin. He says: there is a great difference between the regret that a person feels over mitzvot he fulfilled, and the regret a person feels over transgressions he committed. When a person regrets a mitzvah, what in fact did he have? Until now he had a connection with the Holy One, blessed be He, and he informs the Master of the World: Master of the World, I severed the connection. This is regret over a mitzvah. In contrast, when a person was wicked, he had no connection with the Holy One, blessed be He, and what does he now say? Master of the World, I am connecting the link. Right? This is the difference between a righteous person who now becomes wicked, and a wicked person who becomes righteous. Says the Rav: come and contemplate. To sever a connection, it is enough that one party severs it unilaterally, and the connection is severed. The two of us are speaking on the phone, right? I hung up on my end, you can talk into the air. In contrast, when a person did good deeds, and the person now regrets his good deeds, what does this person say? I want to sever the connection. Says the Holy One, blessed be He: you want to sever the connection, you can sever it. No problem. What did you do? You pressed "end call," you disconnected. When the wicked person, in contrast, comes and says: Master of the World, I want to connect the link, says the Holy One, blessed be He: to connect a link requires two. It requires two. It requires that the Holy One, blessed be He, pick up from there, and you call from here. You call, says the Holy One, blessed be He: who said that I must pick up? This is Hashem's kindness. Meaning, to create a connection, that the Holy One, blessed be He, is willing to connect the link, is complete kindness. Why? Because to create a connection requires two. To sever a connection, one is enough. So what do you say? Here, the righteous person severs the connection easily. True, to sever a connection is easy. He says, Master of the World, I do not want a connection anymore, he severed it, he erased the good deeds he did. To sever a connection is easy. But in contrast, to create a connection, here you need someone on the other side to pick up. That someone on the other side be willing to give feedback, be willing for this connection. To be willing for this connection requires the divine will. This is kindness. Why on earth should the Holy One, blessed be He, be willing for this connection after you became wicked? This is a kindness that the Holy One, blessed be He, did with the person.
There is another answer brought by Rabbi Goldwasser in the book Kadosh V'Nora Shemo. He brings it in the name of his student, a young man named Sandomirski. He says that seemingly we must understand: it is written that the Holy One, blessed be He - why did He give us mitzvot? Because the Holy One, blessed be He, did not want us to have the "bread of shame." We spoke about this at length in the Derech Hashem of the Ramchal and on other occasions. Hashem did not want the bread of kindness. You arrive above, you will have disgrace, you will have shame. Hashem gives you charity. Says Hashem: no, fulfill mitzvot, receive it by right. The righteous eat by their own arm. Receive it according to what you deserve. He asks: seemingly this is a great wonder. Imagine that a person - I will give an example. They tell that once the President of the United States visited the management of the Ford company. And there, you know, they show him the whole factory and so on. Afterward they said to him: well, for the President of the United States we want to give you a car as a gift. He said, sure, how will you now get entangled with the government and with a gifted car and with the legal advisor and... He said, no, no, I am willing to pay. No, absolutely not, I will only pay, only pay. Well, they said to him, fine, bring 50 dollars. He said to them, fine, no problem. He takes out 100 dollars from his pocket. They said to him, we have no change. He said, fine, then bring two. Now tell me, when they ask the President of the United States, tell me, where is the car from? He will say, I paid. They will say to him, are you joking? 50 dollars, that you call paying? So the question is seemingly an enormous question. A person, so that there be no bread of shame, so that there be no bread of shame, fulfill mitzvot. Tell me, one mitzvah, all the mitzvot we fulfill all our days, are they worth one moment of pleasure in the world of truth? So he says, seemingly what is this? This is a person who bought a diamond for a penny. Is this not bread of kindness? How did it change the bread of shame? If you would say I paid what it is worth, I deserve it. Fine, correct. There is no bread of shame here, no shame. But when you yourself understand that what you paid is a penny compared to what the Holy One, blessed be He, gives you for all eternity, then we are still left with bread of shame. I fulfilled mitzvot, but what are your mitzvot compared to what you received? This is somewhat a question he asks. Seemingly, then, it is not understood how Hashem prevented the bread of shame through this.
So he says something very wonderful. He says: through fulfilling mitzvot, we do not become deserving in the sense of "I paid the full price." No. Rather, through fulfilling mitzvot, we create a connection with the Holy One, blessed be He. When you create a connection with the Holy One, blessed be He, this in fact means you say, Master of the World, I fulfill Your mitzvot, You are Father, I am the son. I create a connection with the Holy One, blessed be He. From a father we have no shame to receive gifts. We have no shame. Father gives me a gift. I am not, not bread of shame, Father gives me. No, Father gave me a gift, Father bought me a gift. That is, the fulfillment of mitzvot is not payment, but rather through fulfilling mitzvot you connected with Hashem. And then it is no longer bread of shame, you receive reward from someone you are close to. This is not something that seemingly causes us any shame. According to this we will understand: when we speak about a person who is a transgressor, punishment is due to him by law. You transgressed, you defied Hashem's word, it is due to you by law. In contrast, a person who has a mitzvah, the reward is not due to him by law, but rather a gift is due to you from one who loves you. The Holy One, blessed be He, loves you, since you fulfill His mitzvot, so a gift is truly due to you. And therefore he says: understand well, one who regrets a mitzvah, then it is truly logical that his reward be erased. Because now Hashem no longer loves you. Why does Hashem give to you? Not because you deserve it. We said, what did you pay? You paid a penny. No, because Hashem loves you. When you regretted, Hashem no longer loves you. And if Hashem no longer loves you, you are no longer entitled to the gift. In contrast, one who regrets a transgression, why on earth should the punishment be erased for you? For the transgression, punishment is due to you by law. Something that is due to you by law, why should it be erased? In contrast, the reward for a mitzvah is not something due to me by law, it is only because Hashem loves me. When you regret the former deeds, He no longer loves you. So if so, there the law dictates that the reward be erased. And in contrast, regarding the punishment, the law does not dictate that the punishment be erased. The punishment is due to you and you acquired it by law for defying Hashem's word. And if Hashem is nonetheless willing to forgive you for this, in that lies complete kindness.
Let us conclude with a final matter, which in my opinion is the most wonderful answer said here on the subject. The answer is very simple and easy, and it is truly the true truth of Torah. Let us contemplate. Imagine that someone owes me money. And I tell him: you know what? I forgive you the debt. Possible or not possible? Excellent. I can forgive, no problem at all. Now imagine that afterward someone comes and says, tell me, what about the money you owe me? I tell him, I forgive you. Forgive you what? Tell me, you owe me money. No, well, earlier someone came and said he owes me money, and I said I forgive him. So I forgive you too. This is ridiculous, right? Something you owe to someone else, how can you forgive it? You owe a debt here. He says: understand, this is very wonderful. When a person committed a transgression, what does he have here? He has a debt toward the Holy One, blessed be He. He says: I repented. Here, you see that a righteous person did, regretted the former deeds. He says: sir, what does the righteous person have? He has a plus with the Master of the World. Reward is due to you. You come and say, Master of the World, erase it. I do not need it. He regrets the former deeds. Ah, excellent, you can erase it. No problem. That you erase debts owed to you, erase them for good health. But because of this you also want to erase what you owe to others? Why on earth? So you owe toward the Holy One, blessed be He, you have a debt here. What do you say? How can it be erased? Because I regretted? Ah, but there too, true, sir, what is owed to you by others, you can erase, you can forgive and erase. You have the power to erase. But what you owe to others, you have no power to erase. So therefore the righteous person says: I have a merit with the Master of the World, erase it. I have a debt with the Master of the World, erase it - why on earth? Says Hashem: I should erase your debts? Why on earth? And this is seemingly a very wonderful answer to understand the matter of the kindness that the Holy One, blessed be He, is willing to erase even the debts. Even our transgressions, this too the Holy One, blessed be He, is willing to erase, that we should all have complete forgiveness and pardon from Him, may He be blessed, amen and amen.