In this part of the chapter, Iyov continues his reply to Eliphaz, revealing one of the fundamental premises from which he argues: Iyov does not believe in the resurrection of the dead. Our Sages note regarding the upcoming verse, "Here Iyov denied the resurrection of the dead," and indeed this idea appears in several places throughout the book, with Iyov repeating it time and again. We should anticipate what comes later: at the end of the book, Iyov himself will declare that these were not his genuine convictions, but rather arguments he raised solely for the sake of debate, so that his companions would bring proof and refute them. Therefore, Iyov should Heaven forbid not be viewed as an actual heretic, but rather as someone presenting claims because he wants to hear the proofs that disprove them.
זְכֹר כִּי רוּחַ חַיָּי, לֹא תָשׁוּב עֵינִי לִרְאוֹת טוֹב׃ - Remember that my life is but wind; my eye shall never again see good.
Eliphaz argued that the Holy One, blessed be He, punishes the righteous with temporary suffering so that He will not have to mete out eternal punishment. But Iyov, who does not believe in an afterlife, translates "eternal punishment" into death itself. According to his understanding, Eliphaz's claim is: it is worth suffering for twenty years and continuing to live, rather than dying right now. To illustrate: imagine a person destined to live one hundred years who deserves twenty years of suffering. When he reaches age forty, he is told - it is better for you to suffer from age forty to sixty, and then go on living until one hundred, than to die immediately.
To this, Iyov raises a clever counterargument: If I indeed deserve twenty years of suffering, why bring them upon me now, in the middle of my life? Let me live a normal life until age eighty, and take those twenty years from me at the end - meaning, shorten my life instead of afflicting me. In simple terms: when the Holy One, blessed be He, afflicts me with suffering, He is effectively killing me in the middle of life. Why kill me in the middle? Better that I die twenty years prematurely, and let that premature death itself serve as my atonement.
And what is the meaning of "Remember that my life is but wind"? Life is nothing more than the breath of one's nostrils, the wind; and in Iyov's conception, once that breath departs, it never returns to a person. Every moment that passes is a dead moment. Therefore, "my eye shall never again see good" - there is no return, no recovery.
לֹא תְשׁוּרֵנִי עֵין רֹאִי, עֵינֶיךָ בִּי וְאֵינֶנִּי׃ - The eye of him who sees me shall behold me no more; Your eyes are upon me, and I am gone.
After I die - "the eye of him who sees me shall behold me no more," no human being will ever be able to see me again. In other words, there is no return to life, no resurrection of the dead, no eternity - such is Iyov's stance. "Your eyes are upon me, and I am gone" - You fix Your gaze upon me, yet I am already gone. True, I appear to be here, almost virtually, but in reality I do not exist. With the boils, the agony, and all the afflictions, it cannot be said that I am living. What am I? A walking corpse. And if so, suffering is worse than death; it would be better for You to shorten my days and take me before the natural end of life, rather than killing me in the middle.
כָּלָה עָנָן וַיֵּלַךְ, כֵּן יוֹרֵד שְׁאוֹל לֹא יַעֲלֶה׃ - As a cloud dissolves and vanishes, so he who descends to Sheol shall not come up.
If you say that after death I will return and live again and receive reward - as we know according to truth and according to Judaism - Iyov says: there is no such thing. A cloud vanishes and disperses; does it ever return and reunite? Why does a cloud dissipate? Because the water separates into fine particles. In the summer, lacking cold, vapor does not condense into a cloud, and therefore the humidity is high - seventy, eighty, ninety percent - and a person walks in the street and sweats; whereas in winter there is dryness in the air, the vapor condenses and turns into a cloud. Thus, the dissipation of a cloud is the dispersal of water into fine droplets that never reunite.
Iyov says: just so, "he who descends to Sheol does not come up." When a person dies and descends to the grave, the corpse decomposes into its components and returns to dust, small particles that never reunite - just like a cloud. If so, how can you tell me that I will return here, and that it is better for me to suffer for twenty years rather than endure eternal punishment? There is no returning here, there is no eternity; a person dies - and everything is finished. From here we see that Iyov denied the resurrection of the dead.
לֹא יָשׁוּב עוֹד לְבֵיתוֹ, וְלֹא יַכִּירֶנּוּ עוֹד מְקֹמוֹ׃ - He will not return again to his house, nor will his place know him anymore.
First - "He will not return again to his house": have you ever seen a dead person come back home? And second, even if you were to imagine that he would return - "nor will his place know him anymore": the parts of the body have disintegrated and do not return to their former state. Once it has decomposed into its elements, each part, so to speak, no longer knows the exact point to which it must reconnect.
גַּם אֲנִי לֹא אֶחֱשָׂךְ פִּי, אֲדַבְּרָה בְּצַר רוּחִי, אָשִׂיחָה בְּמַר נַפְשִׁי׃ - I too will not restrain my mouth; I will speak in the anguish of my spirit; I will pour out words in the bitterness of my soul.
Iyov says: since I see that I have nothing to lose by speaking and nothing to gain by remaining silent - I stayed silent after the first blow and received another blow - silence does not help me. If so, I too will not withhold my mouth from saying what is on my mind.
The Malbim explains here the nuances between these terms. What is the difference between dibbur (speech) and amirah (saying)? Dibbur is lengthy, whereas amirah is brief. This is true even in colloquial Hebrew: people say "I need to have a talk with you" rather than "a saying with you" (even though grammatically this is a colloquialism, like the common mistake "it smells good" - when in fact the object is not smelling anything, but rather emitting a pleasant scent). "I said my piece to him and left" is tossing out a single sentence; but "I spoke with him" implies a lengthy discussion. Furthermore, dibbur is guided by intellect and reason; when I have an extensive discussion with you, I bring evidence and proofs for my claims, whereas an amirah can simply be a passing remark. In contrast to both, si'ach refers to words that pour forth from a person unconsciously and inadvertently, blurted out of his mouth, as in the phrase "whether he is engaged in conversation (si'ach) or has stepped aside," which Eliyahu said at Mount Carmel.
Therefore: "I will speak (adabberah) in the anguish of my spirit" - the spirit (ru'ach) denotes the intellect. I hold so many arguments and proofs within me that it has become cramped inside, and through speech I will release some of these contentions, as he says later, "I will speak, and it will relieve me." In contrast to this, "I will pour out words (asichah) in the bitterness of my soul" - for a person blurts out words thoughtlessly out of the bitterness of his soul. We know the feeling when something is on the tip of one's tongue: an experience that shatters a person's composure also causes words to slip out that should not be said. And out of the bitterness of my soul - I will speak out.
הֲיָם אָנִי אִם תַּנִּין, כִּי תָשִׂים עָלַי מִשְׁמָר׃ - Am I the sea, or a sea monster, that You place a guard over me?
And corresponding to these two modes of expression come two questions. Corresponding to si'ach, which is blurted out from inner agitation, he says: "Am I the sea" - for the sea, when its waves rage and seek to burst their bounds, acts according to its nature, and the Holy One, blessed be He, set boundaries for it, decreeing that thus far it may come and no further; am I like the sea, that You expect me to seal my mouth? And corresponding to dibbur, which is intentional, reasoned, and calculated, he says: "Or a sea monster" - the sea monster acts with intent and calculation, not merely by instinct, and the Holy One, blessed be He, placed a guard over it so that sea monsters would not multiply and destroy the world. Am I a sea monster, that You place a guard over me to keep my lips from speaking? I want to speak: "I will not restrain my mouth; I will speak in the anguish of my spirit; I will pour out words in the bitterness of my soul."
כִּי אָמַרְתִּי תְּנַחֲמֵנִי עַרְשִׂי, יִשָּׂא בְשִׂיחִי מִשְׁכָּבִי׃ - For I said: My couch will comfort me, my bed will bear my complaint.
Until now I remained silent, because I told myself that through rest my suffering would be alleviated. Furthermore - "my bed will bear my complaint" - now, a bed cannot speak, but rather this is the metaphor: I thought that those who came to visit me would see my bed and see how much I am suffering, and they would speak up on my behalf and serve as my defenders, so that I would not need to speak. For they know my righteousness, and upon seeing me cast aside like a stone that no one turns, enduring terrible agony, they would immediately declare how unjustly I am suffering, and argue in my defense. This was my hope for comfort - and I saw that it came to nothing.
וְחִתַּתַּנִי בַחֲלֹמוֹת, וּמֵחֶזְיֹנוֹת תְּבַעֲתַנִּי׃ - Then You shattered me with dreams, and terrified me with visions.
Chitatani ("You shattered me") - an expression of breaking, as in "made without fear (chat)", meaning unbroken, and "His adversaries shall be broken (yechatu)." Iyov says: You broke me with the bad dreams You sent me at night. Even at night, when I hoped to find a bit of rest, horrific dreams beset me; and through the visions in which I see the future and what is yet to come upon me - "You terrify me," they frighten and alarm me.
וַתִּבְחַר מַחֲנָק נַפְשִׁי, מָוֶת מֵעַצְמוֹתָי׃ - So that my soul chooses strangulation, death rather than my bones.
Matters have reached such an extreme that my soul chooses strangulation - death by suffocation - and I come and say that it would be better for me to choke and die. My soul chooses death rather than remaining "in my bones," trapped within my physical body: death is better to me than life.
מָאַסְתִּי לֹא לְעֹלָם אֶחְיֶה, חֲדַל מִמֶּנִּי כִּי הֶבֶל יָמָי׃ - I loathe it, I would not live forever; leave me alone, for my days are vanity.
"I loathe it" - there is something that was always repugnant and loathsome in my eyes: "I would not live forever." I always wondered why God did not create man to live forever, and why he must be taken after seventy, eighty, or a hundred years. That was loathsome to me until today. But now, after the fundamental change that has come over me - that my life, which was once a happy life that I wished would last forever, has turned into a horrific existence on earth - now I plead the exact opposite: "Leave me alone, for my days are vanity." Master of the Universe, my days are futile; cease from me, stop keeping me alive, and let me reach rest; let me finally die.
מָה אֱנוֹשׁ כִּי תְגַדְּלֶנּוּ, וְכִי תָשִׁית אֵלָיו לִבֶּךָ׃ - What is man that You should magnify him, and that You should set Your heart upon him?
Here Iyov argues against the crux of Elifaz's thesis. Elifaz had asserted that everything that befell Iyov came through Divine Providence, that the Holy One, blessed be He, oversees the tiniest details and the smallest matters, and that everything is directed by Him. This was meant to refute Iyov's view, who claimed that everything stems from the celestial system - from the constellations and the heavenly hosts - and not that God was doing this to him directly.
Iyov says: What is mortal man, and what is his worth, that You should magnify him to such an extent, treating him as something worthy of close, constant providence? And even to "set Your heart upon him" - even a casual glance. Man is nothing and naught, and there is no reason to magnify him, let alone even look at him by chance.
To illustrate this with a parable: consider bacteria. Which of us has ever delved deeply into them? Who is interested in them? As long as they do not bother us, we prefer not to concern ourselves with them - neither viruses nor bacteria nor anything of the sort. Yet the relation between us and a bacterium is vastly closer than the relation between the Infinite Blessed One and us: we are finite and have an end, and bacteria are also finite; but the Holy One, blessed be He, is the Infinite. Clearly, a bacterium compared to man is like a mountain compared to us before the Infinite, for next to the Infinite, you are nothing. And if we have not devoted even a fraction of a thought to a bacterium - "What is man that You magnify him?" Master of the Universe, we are less than a bacterium before You; why would You magnify us to such a degree, to watch over us and see what I do every day and every moment? And what stake does the Creator of the world have in this? And even to "set Your heart upon him", a mere passing glance - we are not on a level where it is conceivable that the Holy One, blessed be He, would take interest in us.
וַתִּפְקְדֶנּוּ לִבְקָרִים, לִרְגָעִים תִּבְחָנֶנּוּ׃ - And You visit him every morning, and test him every moment.
And not only this, but all the more so: when speaking of individual providence, every single moment the Holy One, blessed be He, watches over man. "And You visit him every morning" - every morning He visits him and restores his soul to him; "and test him every moment" - He examines him every single moment to see his condition.
כַּמָּה לֹא תִשְׁעֶה מִמֶּנִּי, לֹא תַרְפֵּנִי עַד בִּלְעִי רֻקִּי׃ - How long will You not look away from me, nor let me alone until I swallow my spittle?
According to Eliphaz, the afflictions that come upon me are by providence, and Hashem counts them and watches over me every moment so that I do not die from the pain. Iyov says: How can it be that the Holy One, blessed be He, Who is high above all heights, would exercise such providence over me, when I am nothing and naught? "Nor let me alone until I swallow my spittle" - even for the brief moment it takes to swallow spittle, like the blink of an eye, You do not remove Your providence from me.
Such close oversight, Iyov says, can only be understood in one of two ways. The first possibility is by way of vengeance: that the Holy One, blessed be He, is like a king who wishes to take absolute revenge upon me, and therefore commands that I be tormented every single moment with harsh and bizarre afflictions, even appointing special physicians to ensure I stay alive so that I can continue to suffer. The second possibility is by way of beneficence: that He grasps and sustains my life not so that I receive another blow, but because He wishes to do good for me in my ultimate future.
And Iyov determines that this cannot possibly be done out of vengeance. First, vengeance is applicable only between one person and another, where there is some reason to take revenge; but is there any reason to take revenge on a bacterium? So too, lehavdil thousands of distinctions, what reason would the Holy One, blessed be He, have to take revenge on a human being? Second, vengeance stems from a character trait, and a negative trait at that, and such traits do not apply to the Holy One, blessed be He - to say that someone wronged Him and therefore He takes revenge on him. Even though it is written, "Hashem is a God of vengeance", the meaning is to exact retribution from the nations according to their deeds and to champion the grievance of Israel - but not vengeance in the way a human takes revenge: "You did this to me, so I will take revenge on you." For when a person takes revenge, what does he feel afterward? Satisfaction. Revenge fulfills a lack. Yet the Holy One, blessed be He, lacks nothing, and vengeance adds nothing to Him; heaven forbid that we should say He lacked satisfaction, took revenge, and gained satisfaction. Above all: it is impossible for a human being to cause harm to Hashem, so what is there to avenge?
חָטָאתִי מָה אֶפְעַל לָךְ נֹצֵר הָאָדָם, לָמָה שַׂמְתַּנִי לְמִפְגָּע לָךְ, וָאֶהְיֶה עָלַי לְמַשָּׂא׃ - I have sinned; what can I do to You, O Watcher of mankind? Why have You set me as a target for You, so that I have become a burden to myself?
Even if I have sinned - what can I do to You? What harm has reached You, Master of the Universe, from my sin, that would cause You to come and exact such extreme and destructive vengeance upon me? Even if I were to commit the greatest sin, I have not affected Hashem, blessed be He, in the least; if you sin, what do you accomplish against Him, for nothing in Hashem has changed. (Incidentally, regarding the Sefirot, there is certainly a blemish, as discussed in Kabbalah, that when a person sins he causes a blemish in the holy Sefirot - yet even there only up to a certain level, in Beriah, Yetzirah, and Asiyah; while in the world of Atzilut there is neither blemish nor damage. And in Hashem, blessed be He Himself, there certainly is no blemish or deficiency whatsoever caused by the deeds of man.)
"Watcher of mankind" - I ask the Guardian of man: if all this watching over me is nothing but a burden and a headache for You, and I am merely "a target for You", why did You place me in the world at all? And if You say that You did not create me for Your sake but for mine, for the sake of man - to this Iyov replies, "so that I am a burden to myself": bearing myself is a very heavy burden upon me. Nonexistence would be better than existence; it would have been better had I never lived here. And according to the Malbim, this is how the verse divides: its first part - "what can I do to You", what have I affected You; and its second part - and if You say that this is not for Your sake but for mine, even for me my life is a burden. If so, I plead that You remove this burden from me, for I desire death over life.
וּמֶה לֹא תִשָּׂא פִשְׁעִי וְתַעֲבִיר אֶת עֲוֺנִי, כִּי עַתָּה לֶעָפָר אֶשְׁכָּב וְשִׁחַרְתַּנִי וְאֵינֶנִּי׃ - And why do You not pardon my transgression and remove my iniquity? For now I shall lie down in the dust, and You will seek me, but I will be no more.
Iyov says: Why do You not forgive my transgression? How long will You wait to remove my iniquity? Soon I will lie in the dust, and my life is short. In plain words: Master of the Universe, soon not much of my life will remain. Time is passing, and every day spent in suffering consumes a portion of my life. Therefore, hurry and atone for my iniquity, and remove Your wrath from me while I am still alive. For if not - "You will seek me, but I will be no more": when You wish to bestow good upon me and search for me, You will not find me, for I will no longer be among the living. Every single day consumed by suffering is a day that never returns - so shorten my punishment so that I may return to my life.
In this section of the chapter, Iyov continues the debate based on his premise that there is no resurrection of the dead and no eternity - "As a cloud fades and goes away, so he who goes down to Sheol does not come up" - and from this he reverses Eliphaz's argument: if I deserve years of suffering, it would be better if my life were shortened at its end rather than being tormented in the middle of it, for through this suffering I am like a walking corpse, "Your eyes are upon me, and I am no more." Once his hope that his bed and his visitors would speak on his behalf was dashed, and the dreams and visions broke him, he opens his mouth: "I will speak in the anguish of my spirit" with rational arguments, "I will complain in the bitterness of my soul" with words blurted out in anguish, for he is neither the sea nor a sea monster that a guard should be set over him. From there he moves to challenge the premise of Divine Providence: "What is man that You make him great" - man is less than a microbe relative to the Infinite One, Blessed be He, and such meticulous providence makes sense neither from the aspect of vengeance, which is entirely inapplicable to the Almighty, nor from the aspect of utility, for his sin does not harm the Creator and his life offers no benefit to himself. After all this, he concludes with a plea: that the Holy One, Blessed be He, pardon his transgression and remove his iniquity while there is still time, before he lies down in the dust and can no longer be found.