In the final verse of Chapter 11, King Solomon concludes his words to the youth: after warning, "yet know that for all these things God will bring you into judgment," he adds a practical directive - to remove anger from one's heart and banish evil from one's flesh. Let us examine this verse through the commentaries of Rashi, the Alshich, the words of Chazal, and the author of Imrei Shefer, and see how the entire verse serves as a complete lesson in character refinement.
וְהָסֵר כַּעַס מִלִּבֶּךָ וְהַעֲבֵר רָעָה מִבְּשָׂרֶךָ כִּי הַיַּלְדוּת וְהַשַּׁחֲרוּת הָבֶל׃ - "Banish anger from your heart and remove evil from your flesh, for youth and the prime of life are vanity."
Rashi explains that this is a direct continuation of what we saw previously: "yet know that for all these things God will bring you into judgment" - therefore, remove from your heart things that anger the Omnipresent. Do not commit deeds for which you will be called to judgment. "And remove evil from your flesh" - "evil" refers to the evil inclination, and "from your flesh" means that you should possess a heart of flesh rather than a heart of stone, a sensitive heart.
"For youth and the prime of life (shachrut) are vanity" - "shachrut" refers to adolescence and young adulthood, because a person's hair is black (shachor) in the days of his youth. Others explain that "shachrut" is from the word shachar (dawn), meaning that a person is at the dawn of his life, as if the days of life are morning and evening, and this is their morning. And what does "hevel" (vanity) mean here? In the language of the Pesikta Zutreta: they will make him into vapor in the World to Come. The days in which a person feels no obligation whatsoever and pursues all the desires of his heart are the very days that will turn him into vanity in the future, and for which he will suffer.
The holy Alshich explains the verse in a different direction: Even if, despite all your piety and righteous conduct, you see that suffering befalls you and you endure afflictions - thinking, "I was told: do good and it will be good for you, yet here I do good and experience evil" - take care not to fall into anger. When you experience afflictions, and you feel within yourself that you do not deserve them, as Job raised complaints, Scripture tells you: "and remove evil from your flesh." Do not be angry over the afflictions, for their purpose is to purge evil from your flesh. There is no human being who does not retain a trace of the serpent's filth, which causes worms and the mortality of the righteous, and afflictions are what purify it. If so, why should you be angry with them?
The proof of this is that even righteous and holy people experienced this, such as Rabbi Elazar son of Rabbi Shimon, whose wife was astonished when she saw him in the upper chamber and a worm emerging from his ear. He came to her in a dream at night and explained that because he had once failed to protect the dignity of a person - there had been a slight to the honor of the Torah and he did not protest - he was therefore penalized. Thus, even from such a great man, whose entire body remained pristine after death, a worm emerged. Learn from this that afflictions may come upon a person to purify him and remove evil from his flesh, and one must not grow angry over them. The Alshich further adds: "Banish anger from your heart" - do not say, "neither them nor their reward," but on the contrary, it is good for you that through them the filth of the serpent is removed.
The Gemara in Ta'anit (4a) states: Rava said, if a young Torah scholar becomes angry, it is the Torah that makes him boil, as it is stated, "Is not My word like fire? says the Lord." Ravina said: Even so, a person ought to train himself to be gentle and calm, as it is stated, "Banish anger from your heart."
What is the meaning of this? A Torah scholar possesses a sensitive heart. Therefore, he may see something and an outcry immediately stirs within him. Moshe Rabbeinu observed, "Why did you not eat [the sin offering] today?" and the like, which led him to anger and subsequently to error. But from where did this stem? After all, he was humbler than any person on the face of the earth, and with him anger did not stem from arrogance. For us, anger arises from pride: How dare so-and-so disobey my word? After all, I said it, so is he not listening? But Moshe Rabbeinu had no arrogance; rather, his anger was "it is the Torah that makes him boil" - by virtue of the Torah he possessed a feeling, responsive heart, and every slight deviation aroused an intense reaction within him, which could even lead to anger.
When people would tell Rav Yosef a story about distress, a hardship, or a widow, he would begin to weep. Such a feeling heart also causes a person to cry out when something happens that is contrary to the Torah; it bursts forth from within, by the power of the Torah inside him. And nevertheless, the Gemara's conclusion is: Miba'ei leih le'inish lemilaf nafsheih benichuta - a person must accustom himself to act calmly and gently. This is our verse: "Remove anger from your heart."
How much a person must work to overcome this issue. There is a series of books that has deeply influenced many from their youth - the character refinement series by Rabbi Tobolsky. A visitor once came to his home, purchased the set, and told him what a loss it was that he did not continue publishing more volumes, as there are still many character traits to address. He did a magnificent job on each and every trait, analyzing it and citing sources from Chazal. And the most captivating part, as always, is the stories - which also leave the deepest impression on the soul. Reading stories about great Torah leaders, how vigilant they were against anger, how meticulously they guarded themselves in this regard, and how careful they were with pride and every other trait, creates within a person a deep desire to emulate these virtues. And to our point: his volume on anger is titled Haser Ka'as MiLibecha ("Remove Anger from Your Heart").
Rav Shmuel bar Nachmani said in the name of Rabbi Yonatan: Whoever becomes angry, all types of Gehinnom rule over him, as it is stated, "Remove anger from your heart and banish evil from your flesh," and "evil" refers to nothing other than Gehinnom, as it is said, "The Lord made everything for His sake, and even the wicked for the day of evil." That is to say: by removing anger from your heart, you will banish Gehinnom from your flesh; but if you do not remove anger, you will suffer evil, which is Gehinnom.
And what does it mean that "all types of Gehinnom rule over him"? Many explanations are given, but the simple understanding is this: each sin is purged in a specific Gehinnom. One who was cold in the service of Hashem undergoes a Gehinnom of cold; one who burned with passion for sin undergoes a Gehinnom of fire. Every matter has its corresponding Gehinnom, which is why there are seven compartments of Gehinnom, and a person is moved from compartment to compartment so that he does not become accustomed to it. If a person committed one sin, he receives one type of Gehinnom; two sins, two types. But for one who angers, they create a mixture of all types of Gehinnom together. Why? Because an angry person has no restraint whatsoever and is capable of any sin. In a single moment he can transgress the most severe prohibitions of the Torah, for he has lost all self-control, and one who has lost control is liable to commit any sin and iniquity.
Rabbi Levi said: Whoever is arrogant becomes angry, and whoever is angry is a fool. As mentioned, the root of anger lies in arrogance, for what angers a person is always that someone did not do what he wanted. An arrogant person will ultimately come to anger.
And why is whoever is angry a fool? The Midrash does not elaborate, but an insightful quote explains it precisely: anger is the way a person punishes himself for the mistakes of others. That is exactly what the Midrash captures in two words. What did you achieve by your anger? Someone else acted foolishly, and you punished yourself! The damages of anger are numerous, as has been detailed in the past. Today, it is scientifically proven how much damage a person causes himself when he gets angry: ulcers, strokes, heart problems, high blood pressure, and an endless array of ailments. All of these stem from stress, for an angry person is never at ease; everything upsets him, and everything gets under his skin. One who remains calm is spared all of this.
People who suffer from cognitive impairments do not suffer from heart conditions and do not die of heart attacks. Their lives may be shortened for other reasons, but not because of the heart, because they do not take anything to heart. As the saying goes, "No mind, no worries" - having no anxiety, they suffer no physical harm from it. If a person trains himself to realize that everything comes from Hashem, Blessed be He, that we have endured harsher troubles and will overcome this as well, and refuses to take things to heart, he will banish evil from his flesh and keep his body healthy. Likewise, it is written, "Short of days and full of turmoil": one who is full of turmoil will be short of days, for anger shortens life. And whoever becomes angry is a fool, punishing himself for another person's mistakes. What do you stand to gain from your anger?
The Gemara in Shabbat 152a states: Rabbi Yitzchak said, what is the meaning of that which is written, "For youth and black hair are vanity"? The things a person does in his youth blacken his face in his old age. And how true this is. Many foolish things a person did in his youth cause him distress in his old age. First, in terms of his reputation: he carries the weight of all the foolish deeds he committed, and those who know and remember him still recall him from those days.
But the more dreadful thing, as has been discussed more than once, is that many times the foolish things a person does come back to him. What you did to your parents, your children will do to you. One sees this, and the heart aches. A person left yeshivah, went searching, and caused his parents bitter grief - and eventually returned, since ninety percent of those who leave ultimately return, once all the excitement and cravings subside - and later it comes back to him in a loop with his own child. There is no guarantee in reverse: a person can be the tzaddik of the generation and have a son who goes astray. But in this direction, it is almost always seen as guaranteed: the hard time he gave his father, his own son will give him. There is a well-known story about a father who said to his son: "You see, my son? Every white hair I have is because of you, from the troubles you cause me." The son looked at him and said: "Ah, Father, how much trouble did you cause Grandfather?"
There are places in Chazal that recount strictness, such as with Shammai. Shammai's attribute was the attribute of justice (Middat HaDin), and Middat HaDin means strictness - a maximal demand to meet conditions to the ultimate degree. And this does not begin with you, but with him: first and foremost, he demands of himself to meet these standards. When someone comes to make a mockery of the Torah, he is strict with him, and this stems from the Torah itself, not from personal anger; it is not in those categories at all. "If the earlier generations were like angels, we are like men; and if they were like men, we are not even like the donkey of Rabbi Pinchas ben Yair." Know that what is spoken of there belongs to the spiritual attainments of people whose holy path this was.
So too with Rabbi Eliezer, of whom it is written that "he is a Shamuti" (a disciple of the school of Shammai). Rav Chaim Shmuelevitz cites that Rabbi Eliezer went down before the Ark to lead the prayers and was not answered, whereas Rabbi Akiva went down, recited "Avinu Malkeinu," and was answered - because one overlooks offenses (ma'avir al midotav) and the other does not. Rav Chaim Shmuelevitz asks: If so, is Rabbi Akiva seemingly greater than he? And he answers: No. With Rabbi Eliezer, the fact that he did not overlook offenses stemmed from a principled approach and path, for he was a Shamuti, and the attribute of strict justice dictates, "Let justice pierce the mountain" - that was his sacred conduct.
When defining anger, there is a common misconception, perhaps originating from the general public. Many believe that anger means an outburst. But according to the Torah's definition, anger is not an outburst, but rather what is termed an agitation or turbulence of the soul. When a person is serene, his soul is calm within him; but when something annoys him, his heart begins to pound and he seethes inside. Outwardly everything may appear fine, but inside lava is already erupting - and this person has transgressed the prohibition of anger even though he did not vent it outward. Certainly there are degrees in anger: there is the anger of brazenness, and there is one who smashes vessels in his fury, who is considered like an idolater. But when speaking of anger according to the Torah, it refers to the anger within. About this the Torah warns: inside, a person should not become angry, but should maintain tranquility of soul and say, "This too is for the good; this is the will of Heaven; I am not angry."
This is real inner work, especially for people who are naturally sensitive and get agitated by every little thing. The Gemara says of fastidious people (istenisim) that their life is no life. A person whose nature is overly sensitive, whom everything bothers and hurts - this is no simple struggle: "Why did he do that? Why didn't he call? Why is it like this? And what about him?" He constantly thinks everything is in his hands, that he is running the world. Such people must gradually train themselves to realize that everything comes from Him, blessed be He, and whatever happens is by Hashem's will. "It is not your duty to finish the work, nor are you free to desist from it": what is in my power to do, I will do, and what is not in my power, I leave to the Holy One, blessed be He. You do not manage the world. What sets us off is the assumption that things should have been different; if one truly had emunah that what happened just now is the Creator's will, and had the Creator willed otherwise it would have been otherwise, one would not be angry. Anger begins from something deep within.
The author of Imrei Shefer explains that anger, like rot, consumes the body - as we have said, it eats away from the inside. Furthermore, he explains that the end of the verse, "for childhood and youth are vanity," serves as a parable and proof for its beginning, "And remove anger from your heart." For according to all commentaries there is a difficulty here: what is the connection between the first half of the verse and the second? If childhood and youth were not vanity, would one not need to remove anger from one's heart?
Rather, it is as follows: over what does a person get angry? Over the vanities of the world. Why was it done this way? Why didn't it happen as I wanted? Observe - when a person is a small child, what does he play with? With marbles, building sandcastles. If someone comes and takes his marbles, there are screams and tears, and he runs to his mother: "He took my marbles!" And if someone destroys his sandcastle, it is an utter heartbreak. Rabbi Yisrael Salanter once said: for a child, this is like sinking a merchant ship for an adult. Today children might not build sandcastles as much, but consider a child who built a tower of blocks, and his brother playfully comes along with a smile and gives it a kick - the child cries and screams. To him, that tower was precious and important.
Now consider what happens when a person matures and reaches youth, which Shlomo calls shachrut: he scorns the conduct of his earlier days, when he was bitter over such trivialities. "What, I cried over that? Over marbles bought for a shekel? Over a sandcastle?" He then chooses pursuits that seem elevated to him - styling his hair, donning fine clothes, doting on his beloved. Yet when he reaches the years of understanding and counsel, he scorns the pursuits of his youth as well. Tell him now to spend twenty minutes in front of the mirror as he did in his youth, and he laughs. Someone once said to his balding friend: "Fortunate are you, you do not have much head to wash." The friend replied: "I may not have much head to wash, but I have a lot of face to clean!" All those things that preoccupied him back then - the brand names, spending fifteen minutes matching his belt to his pants, socks, and shoes - no longer hold any importance for him, and he regards them as vanity. Instead, he pursues his livelihood: there is a lucrative deal, let us buy, invest, accomplish - and with this he busies himself until his final day.
Yet if he grows wise and perceptive, he will realize that this too is an empty goal. Days will come when you will find no interest in these matters either, and you will say: What was I chasing? What was so important? And what did I gain? What I had was already enough for me, so why did I need to spend my days in an endless pursuit? It turns out that contemplating "childhood and youth," recognizing today how empty they were, offers a lesson regarding what you do today and consider important - everything outside of Torah - which you will ultimately look back on and call nonsense. Just as you look back today at the marbles and apricot pits you played with as a child, so the time will come when you will say: What nonsense I occupied myself with; it is all vanity.
If so, the verse is telling you: is there any reason to be angry? And why are you angry today? As the Chovot HaLevavot states: that over which you grieve with anger today, you will laugh tomorrow. Regarding whatever angers you today, you will eventually say: Tell me, I got angry over that? What nonsense, that consumed me? Just as you see that childhood and youth were vanity, so will the time come when you realize that your pursuit of worldly matters today is vanity as well. So what is there to be angry about? "This didn't work out, that person tripped me up, I wanted to make a purchase and he sabotaged the deal" - why be angry over trivialities?
This story calls to mind the incident involving Count Potocki, the famous righteous convert (Ger Tzedek), who hailed from an aristocratic family of high-ranking church officials. For them, his conversion was a severe slap in the face; they maintained that the Jews were degraded and cast off while their own religion was the true faith, yet here was one of their own aristocracy crossing the lines and defecting to Judaism. They tried to entice him with every possible temptation, and were even willing to accept that he merely feign outward allegiance by bowing to an idol, after which he could live as a Jew in private without interference - yet under no circumstances would he live a lie. He was ultimately captured and condemned to die for the sanctification of Hashem's Name (Kiddush Hashem): they erected a massive pyre in the city square and burned him at the stake. It is related that the Vilna Gaon offered to give him a holy Name through which he could miraculously escape, but he replied: "All my life I have yearned to give my life al Kiddush Hashem; it is the most exalted achievement and the highest spiritual rung, and now I should forfeit it?" Under no circumstances would he agree.
It is told that as he was being led to the stake, accompanied by the church's customary execution march, one of the priests said to him: "Today we laugh at you, but I know that up in Heaven you will laugh at us, and you will punish us harshly for what we are doing to you today." Potocki looked at him and answered: "Is that what you think? I remember when I was a child, I used to play marbles and build sandcastles, and mean boys would take delight in coming and kicking them down. I was so furious; I wept bitterly, and I swore to myself that when I grew up and assumed my noble station - coming from such an influential family - I would take revenge on all of them and make them pay. Tell me, do you think that once I grew into adulthood, I even remembered what they had done, or gave any thought to seeking revenge? Childish games - who remembers what happened back then? Do you truly imagine that in the place where I am heading up above, a few priests down here will occupy my mind for even a moment?"
This is akin to someone who has just won the grand lottery and happens to get a tiny grain of sand in his shoe - does that bother him now? Up there is eternity upon eternity, and the petty trivialities of this world will not occupy him in the slightest. From this we see a foundational principle: consider how many matters a person pours his time into, which in retrospect he realizes are entirely devoid of value - "Did I spend my energy on this? Did I squander my days on such things?" A person must therefore train himself to contemplate and see matters as they will appear in hindsight; only then will he perceive the true reality of life, and through that, remove anger from his heart. Nothing will truly agitate him anymore, and he will accept everything Hashem does with an open heart and a benevolent eye.
The closing verse of chapter 11 presents us with a comprehensive program of inner work: "Remove anger from your heart" - according to Rashi, distance yourself from actions that provoke the anger of the Omnipresent; according to the Alshich, do not be resentful over suffering, for it comes to purge evil from your flesh and cleanse the contamination of the primordial serpent. Chazal added that whoever yields to anger, all manner of Gehinnom rule over him, because he loses all self-control and becomes capable of every transgression; that pride leads directly to anger, and that anyone who angers is a fool - punishing himself for the shortcomings of others, while damaging his own body and shortening his life. Anger is not merely an outward outburst but an inner instability of the soul, and the way to rectify it is through genuine faith that everything comes from Him, blessed be He, and by training one's soul to respond with calm and gentleness. Finally, "for childhood and youth are vanity": just as today you laugh at the marbles and sandcastles you once cried over, so too a day will come when you realize that the empty ambitions you pursue today are equally hollow - and if so, what is worth becoming angry about? With this, we conclude chapter 11 of Sefer Kohelet.